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  High Definition Trust, Understanding and Camaraderie
   Reduce Struggle Dissipate Conflict Improve Relationships Relieve Stress

 Volume 4   Issue 3                                                                                                   March, 2011
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In This Issue
Is it time for a BOLDER you?
Come on, Give me a Duchenne
A Moment of Clarity (video): How do you feel about that?
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I overheard a fascinating conversation yesterday morning between one of St. Louis's most vociferous capitalists and a retired Democratic politician. While on the surface it was civil (we were in a public place, after all), the temperature kept rising as each countered the other with phrases starting with "but..."


It became evident that each was locked in the Knower/Judger. Neither was interested in a solution to the divide, but rather in winning this debate at this place at this time. Each was bound and determined to meet his personal emotional need to come out on top.


How often do we lose sight of the big goal to satisfy some emotional need?  Drink a milkshake versus lose weight. Win an argument versus have a quality relationship with a relative. Prove our brilliance to a prospect by showing him the error of his ways versus close the deal. Bring the U.S. Congress to a standstill versus balance the budget and serve the American public.


When this happens, we somehow shove our Learner/Researcher ways aside, drag in our locked-in (albeit incomplete and impoverished) historic understanding of the world, and attack! All for the sake of feeling good about preserving the internal status quo.


My experience is that these types of transactions accomplish little but the temporary satisfaction of an emotional need. At worst they can place a possibly productive relationship in jeopardy. The Hamiltonian/Jeffersonian debate that has successfully guided our nation for the past 235 years or so seems to have reached this critical dysfunctional mass. Neither side seems willing to step out of the K/J long enough to let the other side be heard and explore the doubt. Best interests of the American citizen be damned.


So as I watch my two friends go at it, I can't help but think I have my work cut out for me trying to save the planet one conversation at a time.



On the weekend of March 4-6, our Early Spring Summit attracted some fantastic individuals who took the time to figure out what's getting in the way and what to do about it. 


Your next "aha" moment could come at the next Clarity Summit. What's getting in your way?  Find out May 6-8 at the Moonrise Hotel in beautiful University City, MO.  Click here to learn more.

"Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it."
                                                                                         W. H. Murray   

  Is It Time For a BOLDER  You?  



If you're like me, you've been raised to think that being bold is for other people-celebrities, geniuses, and the like. But when we fail to take the next step, make the next call, ask the next question, turn the spotlight on ourselves, we lose momentum. A closer look at boldness reveals that it is possible for all of us to cultivate this trait. (Read more...)

Come on,  Give Me a Duchenne.

Cheshire Cat 

How many times have you turned on a fake smile? Chances are, you've done it a lot, with colleagues, prospects, family, and friends. Research on the sincerity of smiles (the spontaneous one vs. the one you try on when you're offered broiled armadillo bites at a cocktail party) indicates there are good reasons to understand the value of a smile.  (Read More....)


A Moment of Clarity (video):  How do you feel about that?  I feel pretty good!!

510 Flying
Click to view video (posted by MisterArtista on YouTube)

How does Rally co-driving prepare you for improving performance in teams and executives?
I am a Rally Co-driver in several series in the Western Hemisphere.  You can read about my racing history at my rally website. When I am competing, it is my job to corral all the best performances from myself, the driver, the mechanics and any other members of the crew supporting us for the weekend.  As you can imagine, as in any racing, egos are strong, tensions are high, and the atmosphere is ripe for interpersonal conflict.
I have a track record of co-driving for racers of any caliber (National Champions to first event novices) and delivering results that exceed their expectations. 
For the rest of my living, I coach executives in leadership and team dynamics; teams in developing higher levels of trust, understanding and camaraderie; and individuals in making changes supportive of getting what they want in life.  In this arena too, I have a reputation for delivering results that exceed their expectations.

HDClarity is an e-zine for those wanting to develop more of that trust, understanding and camaraderie in their work environment, and their life in general.  A smoother running team is a more profitable team.  It get things done faster, for less cost. 

If you'd like to share some of these insights for developing High Definition Clarity in your daily and business life, please forward this email.
"There is a clear and present danger.....when you are neither clear nor present."
Saving civilization (or your team) one conversation at a time,

Kim DeMotte, Corporate CoDriver
(877) 245-8250


February 2011 Balancing Act, You Lost me at Hello, Co-Driver turned driver 

January 2011 Excuse yourself from the Dance, The King's Speech, Reagan-O'Neill


December 2010 How to Really Win, My Favorite Bad Guy, Doing what you love to do. 

November, 2010 Managing the process, 5th stage of learning, 110% vs. process 

October 2010 Avocados; VOTE; Temptation
September 2010 Calm Starts with you; Why I want what I want; Eixenberger
August 2010 It's Who I Am, Conversation Openers,  Helmets and K/J

July 2010 Scorpion & Frog, Failure as Process, and Power of Conversation June 2010 Kick Ass, Shake It Up, Baby, Knowledge is Power
May 2010 Three Responses(Duplessis), Transition, Ho'oponopono & Science

April, 2010 Hope, Tiger/Eldrick, Horse's Ass
March, 2010 Wipe the Slate Clean, Failing Forward, Extraordinary
February, 2010 Getting out of the Triangle, Maybe-maybe not, Who Dat?
January, 2010 Drama Triangle, Blind Side, Summit Review

December, 2009 Red Conversation, Christmas 1914 Truce
November, 2009 Green Conversation, Hate, Jim Abbott
October, 2009 - 6th and 7th Gears
September, 2009 - 4th and 5th Gears 
August, 2009 - 1st, 2nd, 3rd Gears                                                                              July, 2009 - Frustration, Cotton, Coaching
June, 2009 - Unlearning, Knower/Judger; Learner/Researcher
May, 2009 - Doubt
April, 2009 - Ho'oponopono
March, 2009 - The Sky is Falling
February, 2009 - USAir Fight 1549
January, 2009 - Let Go of the Past

December, 2008 - HDClarity introduction