She's Funny Too - Shades of You Photo 2006
What is it that makes some people persist when the rest of us sputter and stall out?
How do we stop procrastinating and get on with it?
I have this beautiful friend, for the sake of example I'll call her "Monica." Monica gets things done. We've known each other for more than ten years, through some really terrific and really terrible times. She is a force -- the most proactive person I've ever known. It's amazing and inspiring to watch her in action.
Small example: Once I half-way mentioned that I'd like to get a different car, and maybe I'd like to try this one specific model. It was kind of a spoken wish. Monica took this and ran with it. The next weekend, as a surprise, she rented that very car and we drove it to Houston. Because she knew that I just needed to try it out. And eventually I bought the car.
She made it happen. She's made a lot of great things happen in my life.
And to watch her clean! I was with her one day as she got ready for company. She said something like, "I hate cleaning house. I'd rather sit and visit with you." Then, methodically, she entered each room (and they were disasters! She has lots of children. . .) and did not leave that room until it was picture perfect. Anything that needed to go somewhere else in the house, she just set outside the door. And room by room, then lastly the halls, that house became spotless.
Writing about the experience here, it sounds silly and obvious, but to witness her way of approaching a big job changed the way I think about housework and a lot of other projects. Again, she made it happen.
You have people like this in your life. Think of how they miraculously pull a fun party together at the last minute, or finish their Master's degree early while working a full-time job, or redesign and configure a razor scooter with no help. What is this magic they possess? I'm with you; I want to know.
Conversely, you also have that friend who decides in March that Christmas lights should stay up all year, who can't quite finish painting the kitchen or get that pile of clothes off their dusty exercise bike. This is the friend who spends most of their time making amends for what they haven't done.
Like the guy I worked with several years ago: He'd drag himself around the office, leaning from cubicle to cubicle and insist to each occupant, "I'm swamped with work! I'll be here all weekend! This place is ridiculous -- I don't know how they think we'll get it all done!" . . .and then limp to the break room for more ranting and a snack.
What is the secret ingredient that he didn't have? (And the one we want.)
I recently complained to Monica about a hurdle in my life that I can't seem to get around. I'm stumped. Stopped, really. She's so wise, this Monica. She told it to me straight:
"Yes, I understand that you're sad and discouraged, and it's been a hard time." (She took a deep and sympathizing breath here.)
"But if you're really going to do something about it, you have to set your emotions aside for a while and DO IT. Do the research, make the call, call again, be specific, set a date, don't take no for an answer. Then after you get those things done you can feel bad later if you want."
Yes, I'd love to roll my eyes and dismiss her admonition, but SHE'S SO RIGHT. To get something done, you and I must set our sadness, fears, dislikes, boredom, distractions and prejudgements aside and ACT. That means acknowledging what real-life, physical thing we can do right now and DOING IT -- not just imagining our To Do List and then writing it out with neat penmanship.
So how to shed these burdensome emotions and move into action? That's what we're going to learn on Thursday, September 20th at 12:15pm and 7:15pm (see sidebar). We're also going to devise an action plan to move beyond these obstacles and attack our goals head-on. I hope you'll join me; it's going to be good. :)
