I Interrupt This Message...
"There is nothing more frustrating than two people talking while you are trying to interrupt them." Mark Twain
We have all experienced it. We are deep in conversation with one or several other people, and just before we are able to make our critical point, the other person tries to guess what we are going to say and interjects this thought into the conversation. Or, we are listening to an individual or group of people and we have an idea to share that is so exciting we cannot contain ourselves and we interrupt them with our thought so that we do not forget it.
We know that interrupting is rude and can harm relationships but we seem to justify our actions for the sake of efficiency or saving time. So, why do we interrupt?
- We grew up in a family where this happened and we do not know any other way to be heard
- We are so excited to get our point across and fear that we will forget it
- We feel that our point is more relevant or important
- We are in a hurry and do not have the time to listen to someone fully
- We do not understand what the other person is saying
- We believe that conversations are a competition to be heard
Here are a few tips that will help you interrupt less often and/or be interrupted less often: - Teach young children to put their hand on their parent's shoulder when they need to interrupt and keep it there until the parent is ready to acknowledge them
- Bring paper and pen along to jot down ideas to so you can remember
- Become intentional about listening to others fully by learning to paraphrase back what the other person is saying
- Ask short clarifying questions that show you are listening and keep you engaged
- If necessary, ask permission to interrupt, if talker is going off track and time is critical
- Remember to concentrate on what is being said versus competing to be heard
- With a group of people at work try using and object like a nerf ball that must be held in order speak
- If you are being interrupted, allow the other person to finish speaking and then use the phrase "as I was saying" to redirect conversation back to your point.
As you strive to become a better communicator in 2011, try just one of these tips above to help you become a more effective listener. And the added bonus is that when you stop interrupting you might actually learn something new!
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Diane Amundson is the owner of Diane Amundson & Associates. She has been training, speaking and consulting for over sixteen years in the areas of leadership, creativity, generational diversity, team building, sales communication, conflict resolution and strategic planning. She has worked with Fortune 500 Companies like General Mills and Pepsi Cola along with numerous school districts in Minnesota and Wisconsin. She has co-authored a book titled Success Strategies: A High Achiever's Guide to Success. She is a member of the National Speakers Association and has served as Adjunct Professor of Organizational Behavior at Winona State University.
She is a Rotarian that has traveled the world on humanitarian projects in Mongolia, India and Brazil.
Her style of speaking is informative and highly interactive.
Diane Amundson & Associates
Phone: (507)452-2232 Fax:(507)452-0090
24456 County Road 9 Winona, MN 55987 |
