Greetings!
We have officially sold our last Why Don't They Just Quit? book.
The good news is that the 2010 revised and updated version #2 is now available at both our (soon to be updated) website and Amazon.com.
For our newsletter subscribers, all book orders (placed through our website) through March 1, 2010 --will be signed by Joe.
Please read an excerpt on "Willpower" from the new book (below) and don't miss the inspirational video from an extraordinary young woman (scroll to the bottom of this page and watch till the end).
We have MORE exciting news to be announced in the next few weeks. Stay tuned.
Last but not least, we want to wish you a healthy, hopeful new year. Thanks to every one of you for your support, friendship and prayers.
Grace and peace,
 Please keep this email in your inbox to forward
to someone you care about. It's an easy way to help a friend or
loved-one who may be feeling very alone.
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Q. Isn't
addiction just a willpower problem?
A. No.
When men or women begin using alcohol or drugs, willpower does play an
important role. Deciding to drink or use drugs the first few times is simply a
choice. The person may find the initial experiences enjoyable and pleasurable,
but that doesn't make them an addict or alcoholic. Certain drugs can have a
much more powerful effect than others, which the user may want to repeat. Just
the same, it takes time to become physically and mentally dependent.
Over time, the brain and
central nervous system will expect the drug to come in from the outside. This
is where physical dependence begins: stopping the use now will result in some
signs of withdrawal. Mental or psychological dependence also plays a role in addiction.
Once the person develops a physical and mental dependency (i.e. an obsession),
willpower becomes less effective. The longer a person continues to use and
build tolerance, the more difficult it is to just quit with willpower alone.
There is much to be said regarding this subject
of willpower, or lack of it. Many recovering people swear, If not for a power greater than myself, I
would still be using. Many
addicts who recognize their need to quit do not want to quit.
Where then will this desire come from?
Whether this power comes from the
person's spiritual life, or the power of their group or caring friends,
recovering people recognize that sheer willpower does not work for them. At
some point in recovery, a desire to stop using manifests itself in a person's
consciousness.
Call it what you will; I call this a miracle.
~ Joe Herzanek
~ Footprints in the Sand ~
One night
I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord. Many scenes from my life
flashed across the sky.
In each
scene I noticed footprints in the sand. Sometimes there were two sets of
footprints, other times there was one only.
This
bothered me because I noticed that during the low periods of my life, when I
was suffering from anguish, sorrow or defeat, I could see only one set of
footprints, so I said to the Lord,
"You
promised me Lord, that if I followed you, you would walk with me always. But I
have noticed that during the most trying periods of my life there has only been
one set of footprints in the sand.
Why, when I needed you most,
have you not been there for me?"
The Lord
replied, "The years when you have seen
only one set of footprints, my child, is
when I carried you."
~ Author (still)
unknown
This article is excerpted from the 2010 Revised and updated book "Why Don't They JUST QUIT? What friends and families need to know about addiction and recovery."
Article photos by Judy Herzanek
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"We didn't cause it,
we can't cure it and can't control it!"
~ The Three Cs of Alanon
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Recent feedback from our readers
We received this email the day before Christmas. With her permission, we are sharing Angela's joy with you.
Dear Changing Lives,
I
just want to say that I read Joe's book; it helped me to understand a lot about
addiction. I have a son who just turned 26 on Dec.16th. He has been into drugs
ever since he was a teen. It became very bad and out of control a few months
ago. I didn't know what to do. I was running out of options. I knew that if I
didn't do something quick I was going to lose my son.
I soon found out through
my sister about something called section 35. I had never heard of it before. I
don't know if you are aware of such a thing but here in Pittsfield, MA you can file section 35, go up in front of a judge and tell him that your child is heavy into drugs and that you want him into a treatment center. The
judge hears your case and then puts out an order to have the person picked up.
That is what happened in my case. I thank God that I did. I told the judge I
did not want to have to go down and identify my son at a morgue. That's how bad
he had gotten.
The judge
was very sympathetic. It was the hardest thing I think I ever had to do in my
life. His father and brother were very supportive to this action. He was
taken down to Brockton, MA at a MATC. He was there for 25 days, He didn't like
me at first; when he would call I could hear the anger in his voice--but after
about a week, the anger left and he began to thank me for doing what I did. He
told me that he knew that if I didn't do what I did I would have probably found
him dead.
When we went down to get him and I saw him, it was amazing. A
person who just 25 days prior to this, looked like death, actually had a glow
about him. I was amazed. Even his father could not believe it.
The people at
this center were very nice. My son made friends there and told me of
how the people there were very supportive. They helped him a lot. He is going on
six weeks clean and hopefully many more to come. He has found a NA meeting
which he attends weekly.
I pray every day for him in hopes of staying clean. He
knows now that he has a lot to live for (his children and his family and mainly
for himself). I tell him it is such a joy to be around him lately; he is more
attentive to his children, has much more patience, and laughs a lot.
Its
wonderful to see. Well I could go on and on but I just wanted to give you the
basics. Oh by the way I told them down in Brockton about the book Why Don't They Just Quit?. . . told
them it was awesome.
Once again
thank you. I would recommend this book to anyone who has a loved one going
through an addiction problem. I have my son back. That
is the best Christmas present a parent could ever ask for. Praise God.
~ Angela U.
Dec 24, 2009
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Listen Now!
Over
the past couple years I have taped various radio interviews. Among
these were several with a wonderful weekly show called "Recovery Now!"
Host Ned Wicker and I have engaged in easygoing discussions which cover a multitude of topics.
New!
Detachment:
Sometimes the best thing you can do for someone you love is to detach from them.
30 min. Listen Now
Past shows:
"Is there a conflict between Christianity and the Twelve Steps?"
Joe Herzanek discusses the relationship between Christianity and the 12-step program of recovery and how they are related.
30 min. Listen Now
(Click here to read all twelve steps).
Step 12: Staying Connected
Giving back and staying connected are the key parts of the last step in the 12-Step process. How do you stay in recovery?
30 min. Listen Now
(Click here to read all twelve steps).
A Summary of all the 12 Steps
A quick review of each step and why you need each one to recover from
addiction and to avoid relapse. We've gone through each of the steps now, and this time
we review all with Joe Herzanek, author of "Why Don't They Just Quit?"
30 min. Listen Now
(Click here to read all twelve steps).
Ned Wicker/Host: Recovery Now!
Addictions Chaplain
Waukesha Memorial Hospital Lawrence Center
Waukesha, WI
________________________________________________________
To get A FREE AUDIO CD:
(Sept. 15 & 22 Recovery Now! shows, plus Joe's 60 minute interview with Berk Lewis "Next Step Radio")
Email us at:
[email protected]
Ask for the FREE AUDIO CD, include your name and mailing address.
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"I have to live; I'm not done."
"Don't be afraid to show the world
exactly who you are."
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Now you can join our
Facebook Fan Page
Thanks to all who have signed up for our
Why Don't They Just Quit? Book and DVD Fan Page!
We now have over 147 "followers"
and we are growing every day.
This is where you will find interesting news and recovery-related posts (sort of an extension of this newsletter).
You can also comment and post
your own "discoveries" for others to enjoy.
If you still haven't joined Facebook,
I assure you. . . if I can do it, anyone can!
~ Joe
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Ask Joe
Q Dear Joe:
My 50-year-old daughter will not admit she is
drinking. She has lost her job and her driver's license. Her husband will soon
be getting a divorce (he drinks). He is afraid he will lose his half of the house
so he hasn't left, and he does drive her places.
Your book has been a godsend. I have a guideline. I no longer say hurtful things to
her. My problem is I cannot be honest with her or she hangs up the phone
on me.
She goes to AA meetings, comes home and gets drunk. She then
calls me and I just don't know how to deal with her and be honest. Please
help me.
--Angela B.
Read Joe's response
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Did You Miss an Issue?
In it you will find:
WHAT SHOULD WE DO WITH STRESS?
HOLIDAY PROBLEMS?
- Q&A "ASK JOE" - |
Please
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"Always look at what you have left. Never look at what you have lost."
~ Robert H. Schuller
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