Thanks to everyone who stuck with me last year as I wrung my hands through this one. It's always a little scary to take on a project after someone else who has done it well. I was able to keep moving forward, thanks to all the encouragement and help along the way. The last two pages were the hardest (NOT shown above) - there was an extra spread after December. Here's some of what I came up with:

"In reviewing hundreds of images from a variety of sources, I was stunned at the similarities of the faces - century old and modern came to look the same. Last year was my first year to attempt to repeat what my friend Gill started over 13 years ago; I am so appreciative of all the kind and encouraging words offered to me by the blacksmithing community. And I am honored at the confidence placed in my abilities by folks I've never met. As I spent hours looking at all these old pictures, it seemed even the men and women in the pictures were cheering me on, too, as I endeavored to share their legacies.

Shown on the left is Bill Miller of Rochester, Washington. Bill's a longtime horseshoer, and a Farriers' Greeting Cards customer since our beginning. He started shoeing horses in 1947 and continues doing so to this very day. Bill graciously loaned me his entire collection of vintage photos for consideration on this calendar project. Next to him is an unknown blacksmith, a lookalike for sure, from a hundred year old postcard.

The 2014 calendar is at the printer now, and should be printed and shipping by the end of the week. I'm celebrating the completion of this project by putting select calendar back issues on sale for just $1.99! This is a limited time offer, so don't wait to order. Details on all the calendars are here.

Longtime newsletter subscribers know this is the second time I have started this story without finishing it. Recently I revealed My stupidest horse training mistake, ever. The response from readers was overwhelmingly positive, many wrote to thank me for sharing the harrowing story. After that I shared a sequel; Stupidity Revisited - the initial mistake + what happened next. I put off sharing the next chapter, both because it was awful, and I couldn't figure out how to make it short.

Along the way it became apparent to me that I've been gifted with this incredibly sensitive horse - one who is majorly over-reacting to my less than polished cues. Many horses are willing to "dumb down" when they encounter a rider like me. Not this one. I felt like an old lady behind the wheel of a Ferrari, screeching around hairpin turns at breakneck speed on mountain roads. I decided I needed to take lessons. So I found an excellent trainer.

I thought I knew how this was going to play out... and the visions of galloping off into the sunset were already dancing through my head. I was impressed by my instructor's horses good attitudes and friendliness. The school horse I rode was an amazing teacher herself. She acted like she was clueless - until I rode correctly - and then I got wonderful results. The process worked perfectly teach me to apply aids correctly. I watched other riders take lessons. I watched the trainer long line several of her own horses and ride some others. She did tempis, and all sorts of lovely maneuvers. There was no drama, even if a horse misbehaved it was handled in a low key manner that focused on moving past it and getting the right response. I was thinking about how wonderfully my Allie could do under such expert tutelage...
 
So, I got up enough nerve to request a session here at our farm with the trainer. I wanted her to see me ride, and tell me how to better communicate with my horse. I told her that I was easily frightened by my horse's over-reaction to aids, and any riding mistakes I made compounded the problem... all the while I am hoping she can help me to do better - when in reality she's forming an opinion that my horse is a brat and that she has me buffaloed. I think that's what she expected to see when she got here - and my Allie obliged in spades.

In the end, the trainer told me my mare was indeed a spoiled brat. She brought 2 women with her (both older than me, and better riders), and their consensus was that Allie is not frightened, she has no work ethic, and she's used to getting her way. That consensus took a rough road in coming, and I still don't agree with it.

They tried to ground drive her with a surcingle and snaffle bit. She'd not worn a bit for a long time (I use a bitless bridle) - but this trainer said that line driving her with this setup was absolutely necessary. She's the trainer and I was paying her for her expertise - so I let her do it. I warned her about the rope issue. But the bigger problem was that Allie didn't understand the bit. She didn't know that she was supposed to go forward - so she kept turning around. She lunges just fine, but someone standing behind her, with reins feeding through rings on her back totally confused her. This woman is good at driving, she was super patient, and she did give voice reinforcements when Allie would take a step forward. But it was TWO HOURS of fighting. Allie would sull up, and the trainer would PULL (nearly pulling the bit through her mouth) - sometimes so hard that the surcingle went up over her withers onto her neck. She bucked because of that - and fell down multiple times. It was terrible. The trainer would slap the lines on her butt to cue her forward. This typically is not a terrible thing to do - you can't hit that hard anyway and it can startle them and get some movement if they are "stuck" - but Allie was already upset, and each slap also gave her a little jerk to the mouth. So she stood there rooted to the ground, looking pissy, and further validating their proclamation that she was a brat.

I was so embarrassed - it looked like she didn't know how to do anything - except resist. They never gave me a chance to work with her, so they could see how pleasant and willing she was with me. When the trainer started bossing her straight off - she said; "Who the hell are you? You're not the boss of me." and so it went.

After the ladies left, I was in tears as I surveyed the damage. I was horrified at what I had allowed to happen. And once again I was questioning everything I thought I knew. Is this how dressage is supposed to work? Big fights with the horse until he or she gives up and is afraid NOT to listen to invisible aids? Is this how the people at Cavalia train their horses?

My horse certainly needs training, and she sometimes will try to take charge if I am not up to the task. But if I ride well, and with confidence, she is quite willing to leave the decision making up to me. I didn't think she deserved that rough treatment because she argued about doing something she'd never done before - for someone she'd never met.

So for now, I'm just working on being a more confident leader for her. By myself. I sure wish I had an expert to help me along, but I am terrified of another incident involving conflict. I've reframed my expectations to include enjoying riding badly.

As author Michael Johnson quotes the "little voice" in his book Healing Shine:

"Best way is - YOU DO IT!" And so it goes. I'll share more next time.

My efforts to clear the warehouse (and my house- house) of accumulated oddball products continues to gain momentum. I've written about it before. The point continues to be, sometimes the space becomes more valuable than the items that are occupying it. So this is where most places say... "our loss is your gain!" Well, check out this super-cheap stuff and BUY IT. And your gain will be my gain, too. Because I need that space on the shelf.