We are about to wrap up the discussion of stages in readiness for change.
- Pre-contemplation (I should change, but I won't or I can't.)
- Contemplation (I may initiate a change in the next few months.)
- Preparation (I intend to change and am planning the first steps.)
- Action (I'm doing it! I really am!)
- Maintenance (I'm still doing it; it has become a habit.)
So far we have identified a need for change, strengthened our resolve, and honed our confidence. We have carefully prepared ourselves for the new adventure, and we are taking action. End of story? Not quite. The task of maintaining desired change over the long term has its own challenges and techniques.
Maintenance is difficult for several reasons.
The new habit often replaces patterns that are deeply embedded with years (even a lifetime) of reinforcement. Even though the change process has stirred things up, the new behaviors still have less power over our choices than the old ones. It takes reminders and support networks and conscious attention to stay on track.
In addition, the rewards for new behavior may function less effectively than the rewards for old ones. Quite often, change requires that we forego immediate gratification in the interest of long-term benefits that take some time to show up. The negative impact of falling back into old patterns may lag as well.
For these and other reasons, the new habit is relatively fragile and easily disrupted. The flu, travel, increased stress in the family or at work, or a change in schedule can derail recent changes and trigger our reversion to familiar ways.
A recurring example for me has to do with healthy eating. Even though I have developed many valuable habits through years as a lifetime member of Weight Watchers, I am still challenged to maintain them under pressure. When I get busy, I turn to easy food. When I get sick, I look for comfort. When I am bored, eating a "treat" sounds exciting. When I am stressed, tasty rewards offer short-term relief. When I travel, I often stop tracking what I eat and drink and chase the goodies.
While these interruptions of healthier patterns pop up often, I have been able to maintain under my goal weight for 17 years. Setbacks like those I just described are "lapses" in the process of behavioral change. A lapse is temporary. It is a lapse when we get back onto the horse that threw us. Again and again. Relapse is another story; it goes deeper and lasts longer.
