The "neutral zone" is William Bridges' name for the span between releasing the past and fully engaging the new order. Our understanding of the change is incomplete and new skills have not yet developed. Progress is fitful, two steps forward and one step back. We are on the edge, gathering courage to jump in. It is a fuzzy and uncertain time that tests our patience and challenges our confidence.
That stress, however, is accompanied by creative opportunity if we look hard enough. Patterns of the past were comfortable, and we often followed them with thoughtless adherence. After the new condition and our adaptive response have become established, we will settle into a new repetitive routine. While we fly through the air between letting go of one trapeze bar and grasping the other, we have a scary and exciting blend of risk and freedom that brings its own energy and potential for experimentation. I have seen it in my own life and those of loved ones:
Aging parents can no longer manage their daily needs, but they are not ready to consider assisted living. This awkward time may challenge you to shift other priorities to help with their care, take a class that offers practical suggestions and moral support, and research services designed to meet the needs of elders as they become more dependent while remaining at home.
The empty nest leaves you without school and extracurricular commitments. Retirement raises the question of when to get out of bed and what to do next. Loss of a loved one through death or divorce means re-defining oneself as an individual after being half of a couple for so long. These changes might generate the impetus to join a new social group, pick up an old hobby, learn new skills for their own sake, or work for a cause you believe in.
These and other common transitions entail letting go, whether voluntarily or in response to circumstances beyond our control. They also move toward a newly stable set of activities, relationships, and mindsets. The process of change, however, offers a chance to try things out. Some will work; others won't. Creative potential comes with the dynamic energy of transition, and helps us resist the temptation to settle prematurely on a new lifestyle.
