One of the key messages I try to impart with my work is the fact that you are always making an impression on someone, somewhere, and your facial expression, body language, choice of words, and appearance all play a role in how you are perceived. In less than 10 seconds, you are judged by others, and that impression is often permanent.
However, understanding why you should not necessarily apply those same standards to people you meet is just as important. There are all sort of reasons, causes and explanations for why a person may look, sound, or behave as they do; some are obvious, some, not so apparent. In reality, you may never know, nor is it really any of your concern -- how you treat and respond to that person is what matters.
Autism and other spectrum disorders are the fastest growing developmental disabilities in the U.S. While the disorders may range from mild to severe, in general, people may have difficulty making eye contact with others, expressing their needs, beginning or maintaining a conversation, and suffer from anxiety problems.
People - kids - do not wear a sign to alert you to their needs. As such, an awareness of some of the special issues that typically accompany Autism, Aspergers, and other developmental disabilities, along with knowledge of the role your actions play in a conversation, is beneficial to everyone:
1. If you sense that "something" is different, you may be right - but don't expect the people around you to confirm it.
2. Be aware of your facial expressions; they are visible, they are noticed, and they really do speak volumes.
3. Look at the person's face and make eye contact, even if it is not returned.
4. Be patient.
5. Understand that pauses, hesitations, shyness, or awkwardness are not directed at you, so don't take them personally.
6. If talking with kids, crouch down (if needed) to be at the same eye level. Avoid "big" (complicated) questions; clear and direct information is much more helpful.
7. Be aware that sometimes there is no filter; what crosses the mind comes out the mouth.
8. Give appropriate personal space. Some people may require more than usual - if they take a step back, don't follow, but do maintain eye contact.
To date, the highest estimate says that about one in 88 kids - 1.5 million people -- in the U.S. have Autism or a related disorder. While there are differences of opinion as to the cause, how to diagnose, and methods of treatment, it is important that we develop awareness of peoples' needs and meet them to the best of our abilities.
