"So, what are you doing on ______?"
Does this type of a question make you nervous because you don't know what you may be getting yourself into?
"Well, it depends ... why do you ask?" is what a lot of us would like to say (and some of us do) but it can be a tricky situation to navigate because what we are implying is if the offering sounds interesting, we'll be available, but if not, we're busy. And that just feels rude.
If you are one who tends to issue invitations in this manner, you may want to re-think your ask. It is probably not your intention to put people in an uncomfortable position or "on-guard" against your question, but this is what may be happening. Try providing the reason for your request first, and the ask second.
For example: "I have tickets for the basketball game on Saturday night. Are you available to go?"
This says right up front your reason for asking, and then allows the other person to respond in an honest manner, without any hesitation.
It's a much simpler way to get an answer.
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