Do you remember the best day of your life? Can you pinpoint it? I can.
Although I loved the day I got married, it was pretty stressful. (What to do with this frizzy hair? What if my groom passes out? Who auditioned these singers?) The days of my boys' births were wonderful too, but again, each steeped in its own blend of terror. (Will I ever walk normally or wear human clothes again? Who can tell me how to take care of this huge, crying baby AND a huge, crying four year old?)
My best day (so far) happened by accident, and to you may sound like no big deal. It was March 21, 2012. That morning, I coached a new client. We'll call her Joan.
Joan was in a very bad place in her job, and the stress was poisoning her personal life. It was clear that Joan was a smart, hardworking, honest person who was just in a terrible situation.
By the end of the session, Joan was ready to believe in herself and her future. In that short and thrilling hour, I made a small, positive difference in her life. She could see her value and that having a bad job did not make her a failed person. For me, it was enormously gratifying.
After that, I took my mom to the "Butterflies in the Garden" exhibit at the Fort Worth Arboretum for her birthday. Although I'd hoped the trip would be a nice surprise for her, it was me who shed a few tears of joy, walking through that misty, present-day Garden of Eden -- a peaceful, magical fairyland floating with real butterflies* -- and alongside one of the kindest and wisest people I know.
To continue her celebration, we visited a cozy tearoom and fervently debated the merits of Double Delight vs. Belinda's Dream rose bushes, while the waiter brought the most beautiful and delicious little pastries and filled our china cups. We took pictures of the menu, the sun-filled room, the tiny creme brûlée, and sent them to my dad to gloat. I'm telling you, it was even better than it sounds.
When life is troubling and dark, I sink back into that day and remember as many of its details as I can. It helps me to know that something that good is possible in this flawed life. And if it happened once, it's easier to hope or even plan for it to happen again.
Come to my next free group coaching session (see sidebar) and you'll think through some of your very best memories and other exercises, all designed to help you better cope with frustration, impatience, anger and even the saddest of times. Come on out and bring a friend. It's always fun. :)
* Click here and watch this! (That's Mom on the left, and yes, those are real butterflies.)
