Standing at the check-out register at the grocery store, I didn't know if she was trying to look in my wallet, see the total of my bill, or was just not paying attention to what she was doing and where she was standing. I did know that she was standing too close to me and it was extremely uncomfortable. This woman had intruded into my personal space.
We all have an invisible bubble of personal space surrounding us; it's the distance we keep between ourselves and others. Different things may affect the size of our bubble:
- The better you know the person you are speaking with, the closer you may stand to each other.
- When talking with a stranger, our bubble becomes larger.
- Two men will typically stand further apart than two women.
- The space between a man and a woman who are unknown to each other may be larger than normal.
- The size of the bubble can vary among different cultures.
Circumstances may also dictate our allowance for personal space. For example, when waiting in a line, we will often stand closer to the person ahead of us, especially if there is a crowd. Have you noticed signs in doctor's offices, the bank or the pharmacy that ask you to "Please wait here to insure privacy"? This helps to keep the person crowding in line behind you from hearing and seeing information that is not of their concern.
The amount of personal space each individual needs is, well, personal. But regardless of what those boundaries are, it can be disconcerting and uncomfortable when they are crossed.
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Remember...
In the United States, we typically keep each other at "arm's length" when we speak, which can also be measured by the distance of a handshake. If you are a people watcher, see if you can gauge the type of relationship people have with the person they are talking to, based on the distance between them. |
