GTG Downtime-Extra!


WDT London Spring Beer Weekend 2012 


A Special Daily Supplement from

The Grey Town Gazette

Three Days : Many Beers : Not Enough Time   

Wed 7th Mar 2012 


T minus 3 
and counting...



Drunk on Science
Enjoying the flow


Europe is a land of traditions: fine cheeses; dishonest incompetent governments; never ending recessions; budget deficits; perpetual decline and unpredictable weather...all of these things we can rely on, year after year

But, there are some, well two, traditions we're really rather good at: brewing and having a good time!

So what better way to shrug off the 'Post-2011-Ongoing-2012-Pre-2013-Recession-Blues' than to spend a spring weekend doing nothing more than enjoying the region's best anti-recessionary tonics in good company?

Rapid Deployment and Mobility are buzz words for modern (i.e. cash strapped) fighting forces, and with that in mind we've organized this 'pop-up' event*


Once again we are relying upon our stalwart allies from across the pond:
who have selflessly sacrificed a long weekend of their valuable time to show us folks in the 'Old Country' just how it's done!

And (ever reliable in a crisis) the GTG's staff will be there in the thick of it, reporting from the front line


Taster Review

As is traditional, to help the participants get in the mood we're publishing this special (albeit mini) taster bulletin featuring observations on some interesting beverages and bars we might soon be enjoying!



WDT London Spring Beer Weekend: March 9-11th 2012


* that's our excuse for giving no notice...ahem


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What better weekend entertainment opportunity can there be?


Beer of the Day

Kernel Brewery
India Pale Ale (Columbus)




 A Baseball Bat of Hops

Seamus shows his approval
Vital Statistics


Creator:                           The Kernel Brewery, Bermondsey
Style:                               Strong IPA with Columbus Hops

Strength:                          7.1% ABV


AI Value:*                       Initial results question the speed of light but final
                                        confirmation awaits peer review


Killer App:                      Strips the grease off fish and chips in 30 seconds flat        

Medicinal Qualities:        A no-nonsense Matron who slaps you in the face and tells
                                         you to stop being a sissy  


Tasting notes:                  A shot of malty vanilla followed by a baseball bat of hops
Grey Scale Rating:**       Platinum

Wt Relativity Index:***   9.1


Seamus Scale****            Woof! Woof! 
















* AI, or Alcoholic Index is a key parameter in the temporal equation defining  (perceived) Drink Time. Ref. Alcohol Induced Time Dilation Effect, 'Quantum Qorner' section GTG Dec 2009  

** The official GTG product review rating scale:
Coal (pants)  Charcoal (bearable)  Gravel (average)  Ash (good)  Platinum (ace)
*** Westmalle Tripel Relativity Index: higher resolution drink-specific rating comparing beverages to the benchmark Westmalle Tripel, which itself rates the theoretical maximum of 10, with Platinum rated brews being in the range 9-10. Ref. Featured Beverage 'Downtime' section GTG April 2011  
**** Seamus Scale: rating by occasional reviewer Seamus (the dog who likes to drink):
Grrrrrr! (pants) Woof! Woof! (ace) 
In This Issue
Beer of the Day
Vital Statistics
Brew Basics
Watering Hole
Brew Basics 





Just four years old, the Kernel Brewery is among a dozen of so artisan breweries in the the vanguard of London's micro-brewing revolution, producing individual, tasty beers 



What's so special? 


If you like your bitters bitter, with an individual taste and powerful punch then Kernel's Pale Ale and IPA ranges should work for you!

If you like Lambrusco and Ovaltine you're reading the wrong publication



More info: The Kernel Brewery  


Watering Hole  
A great place to enjoy great beer     


Hearty selection
Hearty selection 
Cask Pub and Kitchen 


500+ beers but no room in the Inn           


This is a busy pub. And with good reason. They stock a large selection of 500+ excellent beers. Not only good, but from all corners of the globe


Located 15 minutes walk from Victoria Station the first impression as you approach is  uninspiring... located in a 1980's brick 'social housing look-a-like' block that conjurers up memories of typical 60s-70s-80s estate pubs serving keg bitters and lagers we won't mention. But close your eyes and go inside...


Passport to Oblivion 

The bar is easy to spot. It's the place with a 5-deep throng of punters eagerly waiting to be served   


Then the biggest dilemma confronting any new arrival is choosing just what drink to have...the choice and variety are huge and it's very tempting (because by the time you've queued for 15 minutes trying to get served you will be gasping for something) just to order some familiar old favourite...but be patient and try something different. The beer menu is full of obscure and interesting brews just begging to be investigated, albeit some at eye-watering rather than mouthwatering prices 


After you've tried one or two you'll probably find it hard to leave (unless you need a curry..but that's another story - Ed) 


An adventure waiting to happen...! 


Cask Pub & Kitchen, 6 Charlwood Street, Pimlico, London SW1V 6EE  


More info Cask Pub & Kitchen 



Fed-up with Rubbish News?
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Beer, beer, beer!


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Copyright 2012 The Ministry of Light.
All Rights Reserved etc.


The Grey Town Gazette is published by The Ministry of Light, a division of Borg International Ltd, London.


The Grey Town Gazette is published in good faith. The accuracy of the stories is questionable by design and is certainly not guaranteed. If you think any are true we respectfully suggest you consider therapy. Any reference to persons living or dead is unintentional and purely coincidental.


Product and venue reviews are purely subjective and reflect the views of the reviewer(s). Product and supplier details are based on published sources and not guaranteed to be correct. 


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