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According to recent research, most people hire a wellness coach because they want to lose weight. Given the importance of that issue, I like to reflect periodically on the challenges we face as members of a culture with an obesity crisis. Every so often, even after 13 years of success with the Weight Watchers program, I wonder whether there might, indeed, be another way.
A few weeks ago, I signed up for a new class on coaching for weight loss. The instructor, Dr. Michelle May, authored the book, Eat What You Love, Love What You Eat. The book and the class offer to help us find the holy grail of "diet-free, instinctive eating." Quite frankly, I went in skeptical.
I have tried so many approaches to weight management, and only the structured pattern of planning, counting, tracking eating and activity points, weighing-in and attending meetings have worked over the long haul. Still, a small wistful part of me longs for something more informal. On my own behalf and that of clients I want to help, I am giving Dr. May and her quest for the holy instinctive eating grail a try.
The first step is to ask myself, "Why?" Why do I want to eat? Am I hungry? Am I bored? Am I celebrating? Am I diffusing stress? Am I tired? Just asking the question creates a moment of conscious choice. It interrupts the impulse of mindless food-stuffing to which I am prone.
I can choose to eat for any reason. However, if hunger is not the answer to "why," eating may be only one of several options for meeting my needs. Tired? A nap. Bored? A magazine article. Stressed? A chat with a friend. Celebrating? A non-food reward.
Dr May makes it clear that hunger is not the only valid reason for eating. However, she also points out that, if hunger is not the problem, food may not be the solution. Its benefits are temporary, and the effects on health and energy may not be acceptable over the long run.
Once we decide to eat, for whatever reason, we ask "what," and "how much?" Those questions also help us step back from impulse and listen to the wise inner self that knows what we need.
In Eat What You Love, the author leads us through a series of questions like these. She encourages us to let go of both impulsive overeating and restrictive, rule-based eating. She inspires us to trust the choices we make when truly listening to our bodies, honoring our emotions, and knowing instinctively what is needed in any given situation.
I am still skeptical. But I am giving it a try. My confidence is greater because of the lessons I have learned and habits I have reshaped with more than a decade of a more structured approach.
What is your relationship with eating and weight management? What have you tried? What has worked, and what hasn't? Does a goal of "instinctive eating" resonate for you?
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