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My coach and friend Athena encouraged me a few weeks ago to consider the metaphor of The Giving Tree. She also suggested that I entertain an alternative metaphor of the stream as a model of giving and receiving. The Giving Tree gave all, including her life, to serve the Boy she loved. The stream is a model of giving that flows as it is replenished by receiving moisture from rain and from snow.
Mihaly Csikszentmihaly is the father of Flow as a state of optimal joy and productivity. He describes Flow as the convergence of our highest skills with commensurate challenge. I can see the power of such a combination when I think about giving and receiving.
The joy of giving is greatest for me when I tap into my personal strengths. Though the giving is a challenge, it is a joyful challenge because I am drawing from abundance. Giving and receiving unite as I exercise skills and you benefit from them. When I listen to beautiful music, the gift gives both ways. The same is true when I listen to a friend.
It is different to force generosity from the dry well of weakness than to let it flow from a spring of strength. While I happily spend an hour or two visiting with someone who is ill, I am terrified by the request to bring a casserole or tend the garden. I wouldn't know where to begin!
I don't suggest that we stop where our native skills stop. My friend Jen the cellist was not born a cellist; she has devoted long hours to practice so she can offer the gift of music to those who would hear. My natural desire to understand and be helpful is enhanced by training as a counselor and coach. Life may even call for brand new skills: if needed, I could learn to cook and garden.
In the meantime, however, I look for ways to give what I have been given, to flow from the springs that have a deeper source. I look for ways in which skill and challenge converge. Theologian Frederick Buechner has written that "vocation is found where our greatest passion meets the world's greatest need." I agree!
Where do giving and receiving merge in your life? Where is your abundance overflowing and looking for expression in service and love?
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