I've previously confessed within these pages--with some embarrassment around cultural norms--that my childhood was quite, well, functional. Our home was a refuge of safety and love. It was a place where neighborhood children longed to come to stay and to play. (I recall one little boy--a blonde ragamuffin--from two doors down who often knocked on our door and asked, "Can Colleen and Mark play for a few whiles?")

Curiously, both of my parents grew up in families that were marked by brokenness: alcoholism, promiscuity, co-dependency, self-destruction, and more. Only the desire for something better and the transforming "love of God poured out within their hearts" can account for the home my parents created.

I am grateful.

I've reflected on the lessons around love and friendship I learned from my parents and others during the course of their lifetimes: lessons learned by both intentional instruction on their part and casual observation on mine. Seven principles stand out:

Celebrate family and friendships � Confess love often and without fear � Express love without a question mark � Show love without condition and without expectation of return � Never use the love of others for manipulation � Do not, from a place of desperation, grip too tightly on the love of another � Understand that love can sometimes be difficult. Speak forgiveness--the language of love.

What was your experience of giving and receiving love as a child?

How did your experience inform your current habits around love?

Of the seven principles above, name those that come easy. Identify those that make you say, "Ouch." What principle(s) might you add to the list of seven?