Helping Hands Herbals Newsletter 5.27.2014  
Intended Only for Registered Colorado Medical Marijuana Patients Over 21

Big Bubbles, No Troubles. Hash is Back!

Dabbable, Solventless Bubble Hash!

It's been a while since we had bubble hash (due to changes in laws), but we're stoked to announce we're now carrying brilliant bubble hash by the good folks at Rasta Bubble! How many times can you use the word bubble in a sentence?

Rasta uses a solventless, water-based method to extract and process our cannabis into a product that looks just and smokes like Essential Extracts - and it's so pure you can dab it. And considering how many dabbers are coming in to buy it, we can just about guarantee you'll love it, no matter how you puff. Sprinkle on a bowl, put on a rig, roll into a doobie!

Come check out our hybrid Kaya Blend for just $25/gram. Irie! And don't forget - all hash and concentrates are on sale every Wednesday - save $5/gram
                                     
             
  Strain of the Week! Blue Dream!
A Trusted Hippie Favorite! Quarter Oz Just $60!

Blue Dream is a tried and true cross of Blueberry x Haze.

 

One of our biggest sellers, Blue Dream is a superior Sativa strain with a beautiful color and strong fruity, skunky flavor.  

 

It's effects are powerful, with the more mentally-stimulating qualities consistent with Sativa strains, coupled with a strong indica-like body buzz - minus the sedative effects typical of many Indicas.  

 

But don't be fooled, Blue Dream can kick your ass and knock you out if you smoke too much! But at $60 for a quarter oz, you may actually just smoke too much. Enjoy! 

 

To get your deal quarter, say the secret password "Amalagoozlum." Valid thru June 3rd. One per person. No deal stacking. This is the lowest price available.  

                                     
             
Your Weekly Marijuana Selection
Organically Grown Right Here in Boulder!

 
Al's Dream. Amendment 64. Big Bubba Diesel. Blue Dream. Cheesequake. Clementine Kush. Girl Scout Cookies (2 oz left!). Ghost OG Moonshine. Gupta Kush. Hawaiian Urkle. Island Sweet Skunk. Kush Rise. Lil Cindy. Purple Dream. PK Starship.  Qleaner. Rock Loc. Shaman. Sour Nelson. Tangerine Sunrise. . . and more!

PS - We have 90+ strains you can learn about on our website, but not all are in stock at any one time. Wanna see what's on the docket for today? Check our Today's Menu page!
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Big Rec Dispensary on Pearl? Stay Tuned   
        Rumor Has it We're Opening a Rec Shop Downtown      
Golly, that would be swell. I can get irie without a Red Card?
 
Unlike all the shops who have dissed their patients and gone "rec" - Helping Hands Herbals has listened our patients and WE ARE STAYING MEDICAL!

But now imagine a big, brilliant NEW RECREATIONAL DISPENSARY right on Pearl Street, full of organic nugs, amazing edibles, cool gifts and smoking accessories, with a view of the Flatirons. . .  and open to anyone from anywhere in the world 21 years or older. . . and with the same amazing service, products and prices you've experienced at Helping Hands - all while Helping Hands Herbals remains open for medical patients!

Sounds nice, doesn't it? Stay tuned. We may have some big news for you soon! 

And yes, we're welcoming tons of new Medical Patients. Looking for a caregiver? Come pay us a visit and learn about our program! We're here for the long term! 
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Pucker Up! Medicated Sour Puckers on Sale!
Fun, Tasty, Discreet and A Great Goofy High

Sour Candies medicated with 100mg of THC. Gotta love Colorado!

One of our favorite edibles, these Puckers come in Apple, Lemon and Watermelon flavors - and yeah, they're really sour and make your face squish up - but then about 45 minutes later your face changes to something new and unique - a smile! And if you eat 3 or more your face will melt! Neato.

Great, goofy, upbeat high. 10 candies at 10mg each. On sale this week for just $8/pack! Save 20%! Can't be combined with any other deals.
                                                                  
Early Bird Special - Best Deal of the Week!
Two Beautiful Organic Oz for Just $300! 
  • What: Purchase 2 select oz for just $300
  • When: Monday thru Friday, from 9am-11am
  • How: We select 2 strains each day for the Early Bird. Come down early for the best selection. Call to find out what strains are on deal. (303) 444-1564
  • Why: Because we rock. Because we love to treat our patients right. And because if you're buying Zs of dubage before breakfast we think you deserve a reward.

                                    

The Bud Depot - Green Grass for Bluegrass! 
In Lyons, Colorado - Stop By On Your Way to Planet Bluegrass!

Come check out the friendliest little dispensary on the Front Range! The Depot is the sister shop of Helping Hands but, most importantly, it is located right next door to Julie's Thai and next to the Lyons Dairy Bar. Get some nugs then some Thai and then a vanilla cone! Life is good. Just 15 minutes from Boulder.
  • 2 oz for $300 - Monday - Friday 11am-1pm!
  • Strains in stock this week: Smooth Operator. Silverback. PK Starship. Diamond Socks. Al's Ghost. Big Bubba Diesel. Blue Dream Kush. Al's Dream. Hawaiian Urkle, Ghostship, Blueberry Muffins, Incredible Ripper, Lucky 7 Kush, Sunburn, Cheesequake! 
Please note our new hours: 11am-7pm, Monday-Saturday. Closed Sunday. 138 E. Main St. Lyons, CO. (303) 823-6422. http://thebuddepotdispensary.com

Select strains only. No deal stacking - this is the lowest price available. No other discounts apply.

                                                                

Stoner Move of the Week!
Ordinary People (who smoke pot) Doing Extraordinary Things

Yet another Stoned Fool Move from yours truly! Oy vay.

"Back in the days when you had to hide your stash in your underwear on roadtrips, I
Best. Day. Ever.
stuffed a 1/2 oz nug into my tightie whities for safety.


Well, I guess I had too much green chile in New Mexico and had to race to the restroom at a truck stop, whereupon I slammed the door shut, dropped my skivvies, did the business - and unwittingly dropped the dubage into the toilet!

I only noticed what happened when I look down and see $200 worth of weed clinging together like the last few Cheerios in a bowl, circling helplessly, and vanishing down the vortex. I have to admit, I did try to grab it (yeah, I know), to no avail. Gone.

So if you see a spot of grass growing tall and colorful at a rest-stop near Raton, New Mexico - now you'll know why. Stop and say a prayer. And send me your own stoner stories so I don't have to keep confessing mine. 

Submit your Stoner Move of the week and get a .01 cent cone joint with your next purchase! Email to [email protected].   
                                                  
  
Write a Review - Get a Joint!
It's The Most You'll Ever Get Paid for a Writing Gig

Pen a review about us on Weedmaps and we'll say thanks with a 1-cent pre-roll! If you don't have a Weedmaps account, you'll need to create one - quick and easy! Just print or point out the review and you'll be anointed with $7 worth of buds, freshly ground up and rolled perfectly tight! Previous reviewers also welcome! 
                                  
                                            
Need Advice? Ask an Unqualified Dispensary
Newsletter Writer!

Special thanks to customer Jenny for suggesting an advice column for our newsletter. Considering I'm totally unqualified to give advice on just about anything I thought it was a great idea. Have a weed related question? Have a question about anything related to nothing? Email to [email protected]
 

Dear Unqualified to Give Advice Man. I love to get high before sex because it amplifies the experience, but I also get cotton mouth which makes kissing kinda gross. Any recommendations? Thanks. - Paul in Boulder. 

 

Dear Paul. Medicating before sex can make for an amazing, amped, more sensual

Who says stoners are lazy? That's some MacGyver shit right there!

experience for sure. But there's nothing sexy about tongue-kissing a desert tortoise which is what smooching is like if you've got cotton mouth. 

 

So I recommend the oldest stoner trick in the world: keep a pack of Starburst in your pocket. It will give you a huge of rush of saliva and take your kissy partner thru the rainbow of fruit flavors. Also, you can try saying "Lemon Lemon Lemon," which my 8th grade science teacher said makes spit too. You see Mr. Kozak, I have amounted to something!  

                                                                              
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