I hear you! Yes, there is now and always will be noise in the head justifying what you are doing, saying or feeling. I am not arguing that. However, I claim, you can diminish the limiting noise and recurring suffering as you move about in your day to day life.
Would it be worth it to you to be able to trust your choices in the midst of everyday distractions? How would your life be different if all of your choices were in alignment with what is most important to you long-term? Are you truly choosing or are you caught up in distractions and auto-pilot?
What might seem like a decision is all too often a distraction. Think about it, are your choices an attempt to take yourself away from a thought, feeling, fear or obstacle? Are you moving farther away from what you say is important long-term? How do the choices made by distractions limit your experience of peace, confidence or fulfillment? Empty choices lead to empty promises to yourself and others. Is that working?
Examples: Internal and external competing commitments or distractions
- You say you are committed to eating healthy yet you eat lots of fast food or junk food. (convenient, quick option when hungry, a treat)
- You say you are committed to relationships yet you hold grudges, judge harshly and justify taking yourself away from the people you love by being too busy or non-responsive to their attempts to be in your life. (They should know better, I didn't like what they said, It's not fair. I am not happy.)
- You say you are committed to a budget yet you are an impulse buyer or you have to be the one to pick up the check. (They will think I am doing well if I...What a deal, I will feel better if I had that, This will be the last time I...)
What happens more than not is the need for short-term gratification. Is that really working to interrupt the cycle or have you reinforced the power internal or external distractions have over your choices. In the moment, your actions always makes sense. It is time for a breakthrough to making effective choices and diminishing the suffering created while in the drift of distractions.
Predict - Based on what you know about yourself or others, how likely are you going to repeat a habit or pattern that is not in alignment with long-term fulfillment?
Plan - What commitments do you need to make a priority and stick to them to accomplish long-term fulfillment and a sense of control, empowerment or self-trust in your thoughts, words or actions?
Prepare - What adjustments will you need to make either pre or post decision to assure your success? Will you need support, additional resources or training, blocked time, realistic expectations and standards, boundaries, questions to get grounded, etc?
Taken from the book, The Right Questions: Ten Essential Questions to Guide You to an Extraordinary Life by Debbie Ford
- Will this choice propel me toward and inspiring future or will it keep me stuck in the past?
- Will this choice bring me long-term fulfillment or will it bring me short-term gratification?
- Am I standing in my power or am I trying to please another?
- Am I looking for what's right or am I looking for what's wrong?
- Will this choice add to my life force or will it rob me of my energy?
- Will I use this as a catalyst to grow and evolve or will I use it to beat myself up?
- Does this choice empower me or does it disempower me?
- Is this an act of self-love or is it an act of self-sabotage?
- Is this an act of faith or is it an act of fear?
- Am I choosing from my divinity or am I choosing from my humanity?
I am here to support you in asking questions, offering practices, action steps and giving feedback to move through any situation in life that is currently having you live a life on hold.
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