On June 12, 2011 Ashley Green (age 30) donned her Mavs tank-top and went to a restaurant/bar with friends to watch the Dallas Mavericks win the NBA championship.  

As night became early morning, the celebrating fades. Ashley's two friends grab a cab as Ashley walks to her car. She never made it.  

She was brutally raped.  

Within days of her attack, Ashley hears the comments:  

• "She shouldn't have been drinking."
• "That's what happens when you dress that way."
• "Nothing good happens after midnight."

A recent comment in The Dallas Morning News was  

"They all three share a whole lot of blame. Why in the world when they all left at the same time did they not get in the cab together and drive her to her car?"  

It is human nature to be more focused on the aspects of events that we can control. This is especially true for events that we cannot control. We want to learn any lessons so we can as much as is possible avoid being a victim ourselves.  

However, this blame game has consequences. Ashley tells The Dallas Morning News,  

"It really hurt me. People making comments to the point that I could have avoided this if I wasn't so stupid. ...So many people put blame on victims. But you don't really see people saying 'Well, why ...is there this awful person out there doing this stuff?'"  

It is good to teach our children and teens safety using current events. Just be very careful to point out that the victim is never to blame.  

We need our children/teens/friends to know they can come to us for help. According to government reports, most rapes are never reported and only about 6% of child sex-abuse cases are reported.  

I'm guessing a lot of those people just don't want to play the blame game.  

The Dallas Morning News, June 24, 2012. http://www.dallasnews.com/news/community-news/dallas/headlines/20120624-a-year-later-no-arrests-for-dallas-rape-but-a-strong-survivor-emerges.ece) ("Dallas rape survivor Ashley Green on the pain of victim-blaming comments." By Scott Goldstein. Crime Blog, dallasnews.com. Dallas: The Dallas Morning News, Inc. http://crimeblog.dallasnews.com/2012/06/dallas-rape-victim-ashley-green-on-the-pain-of-victim-blaming-comments.html/) (Justice Department, National Crime Victimization Survey: 2006-2010) (U.S. Department of Education, Office of the Under Secretary, Educator Sexual

Misconduct: A Synthesis of Existing Literature, Washington, D.C., 2004. http://www2.ed.gov/rschstat/research/pubs/misconductreview/report.pdf)