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The Queen's Chronicles
July/August 2015
In This Issue
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Donna Henes is an internationally renowned urban shaman, award-winning author, popular speaker and workshop leader whose joyful celebrations of celestial events have introduced ancient traditional rituals and contemporary ceremonies to millions of people in more than 100 cities since 1972. She has published four books and currently writes for the Huffington Post, Beliefnet and UPI (United Press International) Religion and Spirituality Forum, and serves as ritual consultant for television and films. Mama Donna, as she is affectionately called, maintains a ceremonial center, spirit shop, ritual practice and consultancy in Exotic Brooklyn, NY where she offers intuitive tarot readings and spiritual counseling and works with individuals, groups, institutions, municipalities and corporations to create meaningful ceremonies for every imaginable occasion.
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"How can this be?? I know myself as a seeker, and have never heard of becoming a "Queen" in my 50s? Is 60 the new 40? I am in my final year of my 50s, and have never felt so secure and aware in my life! Looking backward seems almost to me like a betrayal of what I have become. I can see the lessons hard-learned and painful, that led to the WOMAN I am now. Never having been blessed (?) with children, I have not gone through the "Mother" change. However, I have always had the feeling that I am "Mother Courage," constantly building up my two late husbands, my women peers, and the men I have in my life now. I entered menopause early, but still have a desire for intimacy. It is a drive I hope I never lose...A QUEEN? Yes - I deserve the title!!"
- Suzanne, WA
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The transition from Maiden and Mother to Queen can be a difficult one, fraught with hard lessons and lots of loss. It takes great determination and courage to confront and embrace the changes brought about by the midlife passage.
 
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1999 - 2006  

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HAPPY SUMMER!

 
   

 

Mama Donna will not be offering public events during the summer months, but she will remain available for tarot readings, rituals and spiritual counseling.

  

HAVE CROWN,
WILL TRAVEL!

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"As mediator between the city's people and the rest of the universe, Henes brings ancient traditions into the contemporary context by encouraging everyone at events and celebrations to become involved and invested in the spiritual process. Her community-focused approach brings a sense of otherworldliness to a life too often perceived as ordinary."
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It is my hope that as more
and more women
rise to reign
in the fullest potential 
of our supremacy,
we will harness
our purpose,
passion, and power
and direct it toward

creating a more balanced
and peaceful world. 
This is the legacy of Her majesty.
- QMD 
Turn Your  
Midlife Crisis
into  
Your Crowning Achievement! 
 
Angrrrrrrrry!

Crow Flag  
 
Hail Queens!
  
 
 
 
                   
 
I am mad. So very mad. No, that doesn't begin to describe it. I am pissed. I am angry. I am irate. I am incensed.I am outraged. I am enraged. I am livid. I am GOD DAMN FURIOUS.

"All men are created equal," states the Declaration of Independence. From the very beginning, women were denied equality in this country. It has taken over two centuries for women to win the right to vote, to have alleged protection under the law, to earn as much as 68 and 77 cents on the dollar (depending on our skin color) that men are paid, and to gain control over our own bodies and destinies.
 
And now, nearly 250 years later, we are seeing our rights, our freedoms, our health care being stripped away, one by one, by mean spirited, misogynistic, right wing religious uber-conservatives. In 2015 there is still no Equal Rights Amendment. Women are still not equal under the law.
 
Of course I am angry! How can I not be? I am not angry only about the injustice perpetrated upon women in this country, but also all the women everywhere in the world who are abused, exploited, enslaved, and murdered - untold thousands as newborns - simply because they are female. Better believe I am angry.

 
My anger is far reaching and inclusive. Every virulent expression - be it verbal, physical, cultural, political, or armed - of religious hatred, xenophobia, racism, classism, ageism, homophobia set my teeth on edge. As does witnessing extremely common displays that range from disregard to disrespect to downright mean, nasty disdain directed at folks with abundant body fat or those who are differently abled.
 
Every goddessdamn fracking pipeline, oil spill, contaminated river, felled forest, wild fire, melting iceberg, radiation leak, gmo apple, dead bee, poached animal, endangered species, and cancer patient, stirs my wrath. Every hungry, homeless, terrified, traumatized refugee and GI incites my furious, protective tiger mother wrath.
 
My partner often questions why I watch the news if it makes me so mad. Because it is important for me to know what is going on around me. I do not want to be deaf and blind even if the shrill blare and horrendous images are painful. I want to feel that pain, to feel part of that pain. I want to accept any culpability on my part for perpetuating pain and peril through denial, laziness or depression. Depression is the flip side of anger.
 
Anger is energizing.
The opposite of anger is depression,
which is anger turned inward. 
- Gloria Steinem
 
Women are uncomfortable with anger. We are frightened of anger directed at us for very real reasons. But we are most scared of our own anger. We have been raised to be good girls, after all. To be sugar and spice and everything nice. Yeah, right.
 
Anger is a natural emotion and needs to be honored and expressed, lest it eat us up from the inside. Anger contains a huge amount of energy, which can be converted to powerful creativity, positive purpose, and proactive change.
 
I think of  my anger as righteous indignation. It spurs me to react, to respond, to resist, to rebel. My fury is the fuel that fires my fiercely impassioned efforts toward the defense of Mother Earth and all of Her exquisite creations and creatures.
 
Best blessings of righteous indignation,
  
signature 
 

Daughter of the Goddess I am,
Sister and Mother to my Self.
Queen, Empress, Grandmére Guardian,
Amazon Defender of Right I am.
Protective Nurse to Mother Earth.
- QMD 
An Anger Poem

I

When in a farmhouse kitchen that smelled
of old rinds and wet cigarette butts 
I hoisted the shotgun to my shoulder 
and aimed but did not fire it at the man 
who had just taken my virginity like a snack, 
with my collusion, but still-

When I sat in a conference room 
in an inquisition 
at the "newspaper of record," 
across from the one slurping his pipe, 
the one arching her eyebrow, 
and I felt the heat like a wet brand in my chest, 
repaid insult for insult and left their fancy job 
like a squashed bug on the floor-

When I was twelve, too old, the last time my father 
spanked me, pants down, 
because I had "distressed" my mother 
and my vision went red-black and 
I did not forgive-

When, during my travels along the Gulf Coast, 
the intruder returned in the night 
and I did not call the cops again but stood 
with a butcher knife facing the door, yelling, "Come in!" 
although this time it was just the wind flapping 
and banging the screen door-  
When across a skating-rink-sized glistening table 
I told the committee chair and her brooch I was a fan of Marx 
and lost the fellowship-  
When I threw a pot of hot coffee 
and it just missed a man's head, and the black-brown spatter stains 
were still there four years later long after he'd left me 
when I finally moved out of that East Village hole- 

II
 
I would have had to be thinking 
in order to have thought-
loaded, not loaded? 
-and I was not thinking, I was only dripping hot  and oh the pleasure, I can still feel its prickling,  crackle over the furnace of my rage,  to see his face go pale, his eyes widen,  his "put it down, put it down"-and I  put it down and allowed my life as well as his  to go on.

III
 
I miss my anger. Decades go by
  when all I can muster is absent-minded invective,  you know, directed at the news;  or a brief fantasy  of shoving someone in front of a bus. Yesterday  I slammed my fist on my desk  and then apologized, to the desk.    Consider the tapestry of the seven deadly sins, at Saint-Denis:  Anger, wild-haired and half-dressed,  picked out in blue and silver thread bunched  against the crimson,  rough against the fingertips, she  rides a black boar dappled with blood  and waves her double-headed axe-

Yes, I remember her.
I always lie when I always say
I didn't know the gun was loaded.

- April Bernard 
Dark Feelings


By Anne Lamott
posted on Facebook

You know how sometimes you go to church or temple or mosque, or to those little meetings for people like you, who perhaps have tiny control issues, or used to drink until you ended up face down, or married; and you sit there desperately hoping someone will say the exact right thing, to help break the toxic trance you're in, and help you find your way back home?
 
Well, what would that exact thing be?
 
"One day at a time." Hack! Thank you for sharing; I wish I'd brought my slingshot. I'd shoot you. null
 
"Or, "You can't feel fear and faith at the same time." How fabulous! Did God stop by this morning and tell you that?

Well, let's see--I happen to have a lot of fear, and a lot of faith, at the same time, a lot. I find the world as scary as it is magical, and have from the time I was four or five, when my migraines began. This place has NEVER been a good match for someone like me, who was perhaps just the tiniest bit more vulnerable and sensitive than the average bear.
 
Or my personal favorite, "God never gives us more than we can handle." REALLY? So let's see, your point is, I shouldn't feel as hopeless or scared or sad as I do, just because the world seems to be caving in on itself, and there seems to be a sniper in the trees, picking off the people I adore? And instead, if I do feel very sad or insane, or not up to the challenge, the problem is with me, Al Franken.
 
When people say this stupid stuff to someone I love who is really going through it, I just hear rage. If someone says "Let go and let god," with certainly and cheer, I know that they secretly want to get their kalashnikov and stroll through the neighborhood. What a horrible thing to say when someone is half-mad with grief or fear. I say to the recipient, "That is complete b.s, and you must promise me you will avoid that person like the plague for the foreseeable future, because they are a danger to your spirit."
 
The truth is, everyone worth his or her salt--all your very best people-- feel broken, stunned, overwhelmed and defection some of the time. When people don't, when they feel very pleased with their personal upbeat selves and their all encompassing worldview, like say, the nice Duggar family, we want to run screaming for our cute little lives. And we absolutely don't want to sit near them at dinner.
 
So what do I want to hear at a gathering, like church, say, or a random group of alkies?
 
I want to hear, "Me, too. I have that, too. I know what that feels like." Gandhi and Jesus knew what it feels like, the loneliness, the sadness. The brutality. Jeus often said, "It's very hard here. Have you eaten? Look--you all stick together, go to the beach and have some fish. Share what you have. We'll talk later."
 
I want to hear, "Wow, thank you for trusting me with that. What a big f-ing drag. I've been through that, too. Let's file a brief with the Complaints department. Come, we'll sit down with a nice cup of tea and plan our strategy."
 
I heard the exact right thing last week, when a preacher on the radio said, "Stop talking about the mountain that's in your way--that makes it bigger. Talk TO the mountain. Say, I WILL defeat you.'" I had to pull off the side of the road, and I glared null and looked as scary as an aging black-belt co-dpendent can, and I said to my mountain, "I WILL defeat you, you f-ing dickhead mountain." And in the following week, I did.
 
I want someone to say that against all odds, there is a solution. There really absolutely is. And that it's not out there--it's not in circumstance. Circumstances do not need to change to feel peace again or even happiness. It's not in amassing or achieving. I so hate this. As Lily Tomlin said, the problem with winning at the rat race is that you're still a rat. The solution is in knowing the truth. The solution is always spiritual, and it almost never has anything to do with the problem.
 
I want to hear someone remind me that if I want to have loving feelings, I need to do loving things. I want someone to make me laugh about our shared humanity and cuckooness; I want someone to remind me that laughter is carbonated holiness. I want someone to make me promise them that I'll get outside; that as someone else has probably said, praise is an attitude; I can-in advance-thank you-know-who, aka the Cosmic Muffic, aka Howard, as in Our Father who art in heaven, Howard be thy name.
 
I want someone to remind me of what Ram Dass said, that we're all just walking each other home. I want to hear that big fat cherries are on sale for $4.99 at most stores; and that peach season has officially begun.
 
I just want to hear that I'm loved and chosen and welcome, no matter what a mess I've made of things, or how defective I still feel sometimes. I just want to hear that it will get better, although maybe not tomorrow right after lunch. I want to hear that you and God will never leave me alone. That I'm not nuts for finding life a totally mixed grille, unlike the nice bumper stickers-that it can be hard, magical, brutal, gorgeous, unfair, hilarious, sweet, wild and mysterious, all at once. Or that if I am nuts, you're nuts too; and we are so lucky to be together in this jar; and so delicious.
 
Crying Madonna

That is what I need to hear today, and that is what I am going to say today, in spite of it all. So there; and thank you thank you thank you.    
The Queen's Court

throne
The Queen's Court is a gathering of sovereign women of a certain age - our dear peers - who graciously offer information, guidance, inspiration and encouragement to each other.
 
We Queens know what we know. And we know a great deal. Our experience has made us wise. So, feel free to consult with our cyber council/counsel when you are need of sage advice or wish to explore a particular topic of interest.

Are you angry?
How angry are you?
What makes you angry?
How do you handle it?
How do you express it?
How does it make you feel? 

I would love to further this discussion. Do send in your definitions, descriptions and declarations of Queendom.
 
Please send your responses or questions to mailto:thequeenofmyself@aol.com
Your letters will be printed in the next Queen's Chronicles.
The Queen's Correspondence

correspondence


Thanks so much for taking the time to respond to
The Queen's Chronicles. It is a joy to connect with you and to share your comments with our sister Queens.




 
Letters in response to the JUNE 2015 Issue:
 
I so enjoyed reading your June chronicles while drinking my morning coffee. Double  Ahhhhhh.....While it seems that our society still has a ways to go in terms of true equality and acceptance of others, I  feel that I am blessed to have lived in this time. I am old enough to remember (dimly) how things were in the South before the Civil Rights Movement. I have been the target of anti-Semitism, and have had to watch my gay friends struggle with being denied basic rights that I too often take for granted. While my grandmother got to watch our society go from the horse and buggy to the moon, I am so happy to say that I have lived to see dreams become law. This gives me hope for my future and my children's' future.
As my dear husband and I move closer to celebrating our 30th (!) wedding anniversary later this year I have been pondering the truth behind the vows I took, vows I have always taken seriously. The recent Supreme Court ruling states this truth so perfectly. It gives me joy to  know that 30 years from now my gay brothers and sisters can know the joy and deep satisfaction of loving someone in a legal union, of entering into a binding contract based on that love and respect. Oh, and by the way, the sap is still rising!
- Queen Adeline, CA
 
Gorgeous issue, Mama Donna! Right ON! xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
- Judyth, Mexico
 
The pictures of the weddings that you performed are so lovely. The couples are glowing with happiness and pride. Makes my heart sing!
- Sheila, MI
 
What a happy hopeful issue. It is so nice to read good news!
Thanks for that.
- Willow, NH
 
I really enjoy reading your monthly newsletters. My eyes are always opened to something new whether it be about a wonderful woman or an historical event. Thank you for sharing all that you know. Thank you for creating a link for people all over the world to be in contact, to learn and grow and feel close at the same time. You're the best. Blessings,
- Marcia, British Columbia, Canada
 
I love your sweet messages. We did a Queen of My Self workshop many years ago in the living room of Sarah Teofanof in Farmington New Mexico. So sweet!
- Desdra, WA
 
Yes, I remember! That was a really great group of Queens!
- QMD
 
Hi, from Rochester, NY. Love your newsletter and share it with friends.
- Pam, NY
 
I love to read your Newsletter. You always inspire me. Thanks,
- Meg, IL
 
Really enjoy your newsletter. I often extract items for my own ritual practice.
- Cheryl, MT
 
Love your newsletters and truly appreciate your mission!
- Eileen, TX

Please keep your letters coming. And do feel free to make suggestions about content you would like to see. Or anything else, for that matter. 
 
Please send your responses to thequeenofmyself@aol.com
 
Your letters will be printed in the next
Queen's Chronicles
.
 
Kudos to the Queens!

clapping hands rotated
 
 
 
We extend hearty congratulations to our multi-talented circle of Sister Queens for their impressive accomplishments and successes.
 
 

 
 
 
    
  
It takes a lot of time to be a genius,  
you have to sit around so much  
doing nothing, really doing nothing.
- Gertrude Stein

 
Helene Aylon, NY; Nancy Azara, NY; Robin Bady, NY; Alessandra Belloni, NJ; Annie Finch, NY; Marcy Gordon, NY; Rana Gorgani, France; Linda Montano, NY; Carol Tandava, NY; and Diane Torr, Scotland; and Martha Wilson, NY;
 
Guerilla Girls, NY; Meryl Meisler, NY; Lorraine O'Grady, NY; Sheila Pepe, NY; Christy Rupp, NY; on the exhibitions of their artwork.

Susan Corso, CA, Tao for Now (Book); Glenys Livingstone, Australia, She Rises: Why Goddess Feminism, Activism, and Spirituality? (Book); Mariahadessa Ekere Tallie, NY, Dear Continuum: Letters to a Poet Crafting Liberation (Book); on their new publications.
 
Miriam Jacobs, CA, on winning the COVR award for the best book on divination for her book, Tarot and the Chakras.
 
Susan Mogul, CA, on receiving a Tree of Life Individual Artist Grant
 
Cheri Gaulke, CA, on her Mid-Career Visual Artist Fellowship from the California Community Foundation.
 
Hilary Mandel, B.C., Canada on her new job and home.

Diane Saarenin, GA, on her move.
 
Ana Andino, NY, on her new job.
 
Beth Kinkle Coons, NY, on her marriage.


Please send your good news, achievements, accomplishments, successes and celebrations so that our international circle of sovereign sisters can send you blessings and accolades.

And we are glad to so. It is a joy and a privilege to share in the fortune of another woman. I recently heard Oprah say the saddest thing ever - "The hardest thing about being successful is having someone to be glad for you."

It takes a centered and confident Queen to break that pattern. There are 60 million thrones out there. One for each of us. There is plenty of purpose, passion and power for us all. May we use it well! 
 
Circle of Concern

Helping Hands Circle


Please Offer Your Purest Thoughts, Your Heart-Felt Prayers, Your Great Good Feelings, And Your Very Best Blessings For Healing and Peace of Mind To:
 
 
 
 
 
 
Adrianne, NY; Alison, TN; Amy, NY; Babs, NY; Barbara, NJ; Bebee, DE; Berenice, NY; Bettye, NY Betty, AL; Chrissie, NY; Christine, NY; Dana, FL; Dawn, CA; Diane, NY; Dolly, NY; Dominique, NM; Dorothy, CA; Gail, WA; Jo, AZ; Gerry, VT; Joan, ME; Joan, NY; Judi, FL; Judith, NY; Karen, NJ; Kathleen, PA; Kaylin, MD; Kazuko, NY; Kim, NY; Kimi, NJ; Laura, NY; Laurie, OH; Linda, FL; Linda, SC; Lisa, NJ; Lorie, KY; Lydia, CO; Lisa, PA; Lucia, TX; Mari, VA; Margi, NY; Marna, NY; Marsha, NY; Mary, MD; Mary, NY; Mary, OH; Mary, CO; Nancy, NY; Nancy, NC; Nona, LA; Pat, MA; Patsy, NY; Paula, NT; Pearl, NY; Reynolds, NY; Roberta, NY; Sally, NY;Sandy, CA; Serpentessa, NY; Sharon, NY; Shelley, NY; Sheriden, MA; Shirley, IN; Sherli, CA; Sid, PA; Sue, CA; Susan, NC; Susan, NY; Terese, NY; Terri, FL; Urvashi, NY; Vicki, MN; Weslea, ME; and Yvette, NY; who are in the process of healing themselves from illness, accident, injury, or surgery.
 
Amy, NY; D. Barbara, NY; Beverly, NY; Carol, NY; Diana, FL; Eleni, NY; Gaetana, NY; Joanne, NY; Kimberly, NY; Kyia, MN; Linda, NY; Linda, NY; Maureen, NY; Meryl, NY; Beedee, NY; Patricia, Australia; Regi, CA;Sheryll, CA;Susan, NY; and Svetlana, NY; who would benefit greatly from some spiritual support.
 
Ali, VT; Annie, NY; Barbara, NY; Barbara, CA; Carol, NY; Chrys, NY; Deni, NY; Diane, NY; Erica, New Zealand; Erica, CT; Gaetana, NY; Gail, NY; Hemetra, PA; Janet, CT; Kat, NY; Kate, NY; Kathrine, Denmark; Laurie, OH; Lois, NY; Marla, NY; Mary, CO; Marya, NY; Meryl, NY; Nancy, NC; and Roslyn, NJ; the caregivers who are in weary need of care themselves.

May Their Spirits Rest in Peace:
Omialadora Ajamu, FL
Beep Cutright, VA
Ronnie Gilbert, CA
Leslie Lyn Hershkowitz, IA
Deborah Light, FL
Shigeko Kubota, NY
Faigy Mayer, NY
Kat Mulvaney, NY
Ledell Mulvaney, NY
Ingrid Sischy, NY
CArol Young, NJ
Natalie Zarchin, CA
 
Heartfelt Condolences: 
Geri Baldwin, FL
Sandra Brent. NY
Francine Hershkowitz, NY
Tori Jenkins, VA
Donna Korones, CA
Nyota Nayo, NY
Ava Park, CA
Flash Silvermoon, FL
Gayke Phillips Williams, NC
 
Prayer requests: 
I've been struggling with an injured leg and hip (fell on a slippery deck in April) that keeps going wonky. Yes, I've done PT, massage, cranial sacral, chiropractic and more. If you are moved to send my leg healing energy, please do so and I will greatly appreciate it. Thankfully I can still make images and objects, and write in my studio, but I'm sadly now on a dancing and walking hiatus until this heals more completely. REST.
- Bevery, WA
 
                    Helping Hands
 
Please send your requests for physical and spiritual healing and positive energy so that the powerful women of The Queen's Court might send their prayers and blessings to you in your time of need. 
   
 
If someone listens, or stretches out a hand,
or whispers a kind word of encouragement,
extraordinary things begin to happen.
- Loretta Girzartis
 

~ ROYAL RESOURCES FOR QUEENLY WOMEN ~


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