November 2014 

   Presents           "Spotlight on Parenting"
In Case You Missed It...
Recap of Local Parenting Events
Below are brief summaries of two recent events for parents in our community. Both took place in October.  The first, "End Distracted Driving," held at Radnor High School, stressed the importance of reducing temptations and adjusting your surroundings to reduce distracted driving and its potentially tragic consequences.  Another program, "Character Building For Success," held at The Shipley School, focused on how to raise children in the age of entitlement.

  "End Distracted Driving --
An Adult Presentation"
Radnor High School, October 13, 2014
Joel Feldman, Esq. Founder of Casey Feldman Foundation, was the presenter. His daughter, Casey Feldman, was killed by a distracted driver in 2009.


Reasons for the Program

More than 10 people are killed and 1000 injured every day from distracted driving. These casualties are 100% preventable. The presentation served to raise awareness and help promote safer driving habits.


Main Takeaways for Parents and Families

There are 3 types of distracted driving: Manual, Visual and Cognitive.

Distracted driving is any activity which:

  1.  Takes our hands of the wheel (manual)
  2.  Takes our eyes off the road (visual)
  3.  Takes our mind off the primary task of driving (cognitive)

It is important to honestly reflect on how you engage in any of these.


You are a Role Model

Your kids learn from how you drive and behave in the car.

Joel reminded everyone to "Be the driver you want your teen to be."


Talk with you kids about it

If you sometimes drive distracted, then admit you do it and ask your kids to help you stop. Discuss how they can speak up for themselves if they are passengers in a car when the driver drives distracted. Suggest that they speak up and:

  1. Acknowledge the dangerous behavior
  2. Voice their feelings
  3. Solve the problem by offering a solution (e.g. "Put your phone down, you need to focus on driving. "You can call later," or "I can answer the phone for you.")  


Habits are hard to change. Commit to changing and plan ahead.

Prepare before you drive. Reduce temptations and arrange surroundings so you will not engage in distracted driving. Distracted Driving is a selfish choice. You control your choices.


For a  Family Safe Driving Agreement between you and your child, please visit

  "Character Building For Success"


The Shipley School, October 9, 2014


Michele Borba, Ed.D.  Dr. Borba has written more than 20 books about the healthy development of children and the healthy relationship between parent and child. Information for character building is the focus her book, The Big Book of Parenting Solutions-101 Answers for Parents.


Reasons for Program

Dr. Borba asked, "How do we raise a generation of children in an age of the 'selfie' and entitlement?"  Studies of adolescence show a 40-year trending increase in narcissism and a decrease in empathy among adolescents. She also noted an increase in mental illness over the last 20 years among college students.  


Main Takeaways for Parents and Families Parents should provide their child with unconditional love and acceptance, reachable expectations and opportunities to be heard. Aim to be respectful and democratic.


 Character building suggestions

  1. Develop face-to-face communications skills. Too much time is spent on the computer and texting. Foster at least some consistent face-to-face communication with no screens present.
  2. Encourage a child to stand up straight and develop good body language which enhances well-being and discourages bullying.
  3. Boost self-control by practicing delayed gratification.
  4. Develop coping skills by using the 1-3-10 method. When needing to settle down or de-stress, take 1 second to calm down, take 3 deep breaths and count to 10.
  5. Encourage your child to develop grit.  Emphasize and praise their efforts, not the final grade.
  6. Develop a method for problem solving using STAND method:
              (S) stop, calm down
              (T) tell what's wrong
              (A) assess alternatives to solve the problem
              (N) narrow choices
              (D) decide on the right solution

Reminder for helping children adopt new habits

It takes at least 21 days to change a habit or develop a desirable character trait.  Therefore, parents should encourage their children to focus on a desired character trait for 21 days to yield more lasting results.



The top 8 traits desired by employers today are: communication skills, work ethic, team work, initiative, interpersonal skills, problem solving, risk taking and empathy.


For More Information and twitter - @micheleborba


Related/Suggested Resources:

College Overwhelmed by Kadison

Mindset by Carol Dweck

Mistakes That Worked by Jones

The Optimistic Child by Martin Seligman

The Big Book of Parenting Solutions by Michele Borba 

Community Events

 Speak Up! at Harriton

Wed., November 12th at 7:30 p.m.
Harriton High School
 The main topic of discussion will
be on "Self Acceptance." Other breakout topics include
relationships, drugs and alcohol,
and balancing stress and pressure. For Further Details, Click Here 
Learn How to "Interview Wise"
Monday, November 17th at 7:00 p.m.
The New Leaf Club
Prepare recent graduates as they transition into the job market
focusing on interview success
and personal presentation.  For Further Details, Click Here
Nurturing Strong Family Relationships During 
The Teenage Years -- Webinar
Wednesday, November 19th
from 12:00 p.m. to 1:00 p.m.
Relationships are the foundation of family strengths. Learn how they change as children become teenagers and how to strengthen them.  For Further Details, Click Here



In The News 
Everyday Parenting Ideas:  Strategies for Setting Expectations
Set goals both individually and
as a family. 


Friends Can Be Dangerous
Peers not only makes adolescents more reward-sensitive but also
draws them to immediate, rather
than longer-term, rewards.   


Hearing That Things Can Change Helps Teens Dodge Depression
Teaching teenagers about their brains' neuroplasticity can reduce incidents of depression.
For More Information
visit our website at
Since 1999, the Coalition has been providing programs and resources to build assets in our children, our families, 
and our community, to help reduce stress, alcohol use, drug use, violence, and other risky behavior among youth.

Coalition for Youth 

P.O. Box 23, Narberth, PA 19063

(484) 337-8731