7 Step Process To Regaining Trust In Recovery

 (Reprint from sobernation.com)

Drug [and lust] addicts lose things. It's just what happens.

They lose money, they lose weight, they lose jobs, they lose freedom. From time to time, they will even lose their drugs. We all remember tearing our rooms and our cars apart for that little baggie that was just on our lap. The struggle is real...

At the end of the road, almost every addict will lose trust. Losing trust is possibly the most painful loss of all. It's agonizing, knowing that your family hides their valuables before you come over, or hearing the tone in your mothers voice when you tell her you will do something for her and she just doesn't believe you. It fills you with guilt and shame.

Trust is never taken, it is always earned. It's one of the few Universal truths. It will always be this way, and because we are unable to take or steal trust, it makes it even harder to regain. There are no short cuts when rebuilding relationships.

I have spent a long time putting this together in my head. Together, we came up with a 7 step plan in rebuilding trust. If you want to earn someone's trust back, and you are willing to earn it, than follow us. See full article. 

Step One - First You Must Focus On Yourself

Our natural inclination is to beg for forgiveness. Empty promises like "I'll do anything," or "I swear it will never happen again," they just don't mean anything. At the very least, during your first year in recovery, you can expect people to be skeptical of everything you do.

People lose trust because of behavior. You lose trust because of something you did. In order to fix your behavior, it must happen from the inside out. There is no other way to do it.

The first step is to turn your focus inward. Don't worry about apologizing, or buying flowers, or writing someone a heartfelt letter. Forget all that shit. Look inward. The lies and the deceit that came from our addiction is always rooted within, so that is where you must begin.

I wouldn't advise turning your back on anyone, but you often have to remove yourself from the situation. Healing will come with time.

To be continued... 

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Discuss these ideas with your friends on the forum.

Bardichever Megillas Ester

 (See this post on the forum ) 

HERE IS A GEVALDIGGER CHIZZUK WE CAN GET FROM THE MEGILLA!

LETS COMPARE AND CONTRAST THE TWO LOWEST POINTS OF

MORDECHAI HATZADDIK  AND HAMAN HARASHA
 
IF I HAD TO CHOOSE THE WORST DAY IN MOREDCHAI HATZADDIKS LIFE

I WOULD GUESS IT WAS THE DAY THAT HAMAN HARASHA WENT TO SEE IF MORDECHAI WAS BOWING TO HIM

AND IT SAYS

THAT HAMAN SAW THAT MORDECHAI "LO YICHREH VILO YISHTACHVEH"

MORDECHAI WILL NOT BOW OR PROSTRATE"

IMAGINE THE BURDEN OF THE RESPONSIBILITY ON MORDECHAIS SHOULDERS

ALL OF KLALL YISROEL ARE SLATED FOR ANNIHILATION

WHY? SOME OLD JEW A RELIC FROM A PREVIOUS GENERATION IS SO STUBBORN HE WILL NOT BOW TO THE KINGS

HIGHEST MINISTER

ANOTHER POINT

WHY IS IT SAID IN A FUTURE TENSE?  MORDECHAI WILL NOT BOW/ MAYBE HAMAN SHOULS "WEAR HIM DOWN OR

 PUNISH HIM OR FORCE HIM TO BOW??


NOW LET US ANALIZE HAMANS WORST DAY

WHICH IS THE DAY HE THOUGHT WIL PAN OUT TO BE THE GREATEST DAY IN HIS LIFE

THE DAY HE WAS INVITED TO HIS SECOND PRIVATE MEAL WITH THE ROYALS

THE KIKG ASKS HIM HIM FOR ADVICE ON HONORING AN HONORABLE PERSON

AHA ITS ME

AND HAMAN IS IMAGINING HIMSELF PARADED THROUGH THE STREETS WITH MARCHING BANDS AND MORDECHAI

TRUMPETING HAMANS HONOR

AND AHA

TONITE MY ENEMY WILL HANG FROM THE GALLOWS

OH HOW I WILL ENJOY THE ROYAL FEAST


WE KNOW THE STORY HAMAN WAS MORDECHAIS BARBER BATHER AND HORSE RIDER

HE WAS SHOWERED WITH UNUSUAL CONFETTI

EMBARRASSED AND DEJECTED

HE SCAMPERS TO MAKE HIS ROYAL DINNER

NOW HIS WIFE TELLS HIM A GREAT "CHIZZUK"

"IF MORDECHAI IS A JEW

THAT YOU HAVE BEGUN TO FALL IN FRONT OF HIM

BEWARE HE IS UNTOUCHABLE WHY? YOU WILL FALL IN FRONT OF HIM"

(BTW SHE WAS RIGHT HAMAN WAS HANGING FROM HIS NECK PUNCTUATING THE SHUSHAN SKYLINE WITH HIS DEAD BODY)

WHAT IS THE ADVICE ZERESH TELLS HIM?

WHAT IS THE IF MORDECHAI IS A JEW?

HASNT SHE BEEN PART OF THE PLOT TO KILL MORDECHAI?

DOES SHE NOT KNOW HI RELIGION?

OK BARDS SPILL THE BEANS

HERE GOES (I HAVENT SAID HERE GOES IN A WHILE)

MORDECHAI IN HIS WEAKEST MOMENT WAS SO FULL OF STRENGTH

HAMAN SAW IN HIS RESISTANCE THAT MORDECHAI WILL NEVER EVER EVER BOW TO HIM

NO MATTER WHAT

PUNISH TRY TO WEAR HIM DOWN  TORTURE

NEVER!!!!

LO YICHRA NOT NOW NOT LATER!!!

HAMAN IS A CHEAP SUIT

HE IS GROWING WILDLY

BUT AS SOON AS HE HITS THE ROUGH PATCH BOOM HE IS DONE GONE NOOSE READY!!!

 A YEED MAY SLIP OR EVEN FALL BUT HE IS NOT A "GEFALLINNER"

ONLY HAMAN IS NAFAL TIPOL

MAY HASHEM BLESS US WITH A WONDERFUL HAPPY JOYOUS LEBEDIGGE FREAYLICHE PURIM!!!!!! 

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Discuss these ideas with your friends on the forum.

Please note that the booklets are sent in a plain yellow envelope, reinforced to prevent tearing open. Only the sender's address (NOT GYE) and the recipient's address are on the envelope and the required Post shipping label.