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GuardYourEyes Chizuk E-Mail (No. 1143)

Getting stronger every day!

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ANNOUNCING - TOMORROW!

PLEASE JOIN US FOR

THE LAUNCH of the 12th Cycle of the 12-Step Phone Conference

The Big Book Study Group

NEW CYCLE BEGINS

THIS MONDAY MARCH 31ST, 2014

* 8:30am with Cap'n Steve BACK at the HELM
* 12 Noon with Duvid Chaim
* 10:20 pm with Cap'n Shlomo
* Mondays, Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Thursdays!
* (all times are EST)

The Conference Call In Number is (209) 255-1000
Participant Access Code 637207#

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One of the Big Yesodos of the 12-Step Program

We need to let go of the need to control. This is one of the biggest secrets to breaking the addiction. Why do we act out? Because life is tough and we can't control it, so we resort to our own little corner where WE are in control, where WE can make ourselves feel good...

When we learn to "let go and let G-d", we can accept the bumps of life without the need to control.

It's a little scary at first, it's like trusting the makers of the roller-coaster that you'll be safe, even on the way down. We feel like screaming, like we're going to die. But we know that the one who made the roller-coaster made it safe, so we can let go and enjoy the ride - as scary as it seems.

Same with the addiction and with life in general. We need to trust the maker of the ride (Hashem) that as scary as it seems, we are in good hands. We let go of the need to control our circumstances, and let Him worry about us. This is a paradigm shift in thinking that we can learn through the 12-Step program.

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Video/Audio Link of the Day

All I want is for you to try

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Sayings of the Day

My sponsor told me to just ask G-d what is His will for me today. I'm to sick to ask G-d for other stuff...

If you're thinking about relapsing in your addiction, put it off for fifteen minutes. Repeat as needed.

People often say that motivation doesn't last. Well, neither does bathing - that's why we recommend it daily.

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We are only as sick as our secrets

By Skeptical

As addicts, we tend to feel that if anyone knew about our issues, there's no way they'd accept us. How can anyone possibly be ok with someone who does such lowly things?

And so, we hide. And hiding takes up a lot of time, energy and worry.

As we hide, we're shutting out the possibility of getting help, and the problem grows.

The thing is, nobody is perfect and every person has challenges in some area or another.
So in reality, when we share our secrets with others, their natural reaction isn't usually one of rejection - they are able to accept our shortcomings, because they recognize that they also have shortcomings.

You see, as self-absorbed people, what is at the forefront of our minds is our shortcomings. Yet, our self-perception is not usually the way others see us. While we see our issues as a huge ugly scar, others see the good in us and realize we're human just like them.

As the secret grows, they tend to come out eventually - especially to those closest to us. Coming right out and sharing with them usually meets with much more understanding than otherwise. Spouses are usually more angry about the feeling of betrayal than they are about the actual activity.

Sharing the secret means gaining help. Keeping it secret makes it grow.