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GuardYourEyes Chizuk E-Mail (No. 1105) 

Getting stronger every day!

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Our Yearly Appeal:

A Tremendous Merit for Yom-Hadin!

 

Dear members,

 

GuardYourEyes makes a once-a-year appeal, starting before Rosh Hashana and continuing until Yom-Kippur, during this most auspicious time of Teshuvah and Tzedaka.

 

Can there be a greater zechus than to enter into the Yimei Hadin with the merit of being a partner in enabling thousands of other Jews to do Teshuvah?

 

Click here to see our campaign e-mail this year.    

    

Midah Kineged Midah - if we are doing our best to help others who struggle, Hashem will look favorably upon our Teshuvah efforts and help us too!

 

The GuardYourEyes website has undergone a complete overhaul in the past year and we are continuing to come out with new features all the time. We launched the new advanced partner system & phone community a few months ago, and we are about to officially launch our new chat room system (members can already use it here). We are switching soon to a new and improved forum. Very soon, new members will be able to sign up to our site and get access to all our features at once; the chat rooms, forum, partner program, 90-day chart, etc. (The way it was until now, you need to sign up for each feature separately). We also developed GYE networks in Hebrew, Yiddish, French and Spanish, all in the past year! 

 

In addition, we launched this year a new website to help people with filters: venishmartem.com, and it is helping thousands of Yidden world-wide.

Our goal is to bring protection and the message of hope to every Jew, anywhere in the world. Whoever has a part in this revolution is definitely hastening the coming of Moshiach.

 

Please help us reach our goal of $50,000 this year! 

 

You can make larger donations more manageable by using the monthly payment options on our donation page (by both credit card and Paypal). For example, you can donate the generous amount of $432, yet pay only $36 for 12 months. Please help us reach our goal!

 

With your help we can change the world.

 

Purchase a true advocate for Yom Hadin!

 

(Anonymous donations possible)

Donate by phone: 646-600-8100
Ext.3
(If there's no answer, please leave your number and we'll call you back)

Checks can be made out to: "GYE Corp." and mailed to:
GYE Corp.

P.O. Box 32380 

Pikesville, MD 21282

U.S.A.

Donations are tax deductible

 

(Please send us your e-mail contacts so we can send our once-a-year campaign letter to more Yidden and spread the word about our work. See here for an easy way to harvest your e-mail addresses)   

  

In the merit of our  striving for purity and helping others, may be all be zoche to a Ksivah Vachasimah Tova and a sweet new year of happiness and serenity! 

 

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  Standing Before Hashem on Rosh Hashana...

 

What Do We Really Want?

 

By "Shabsi"

 

On this past Thursday night's call we discussed an idea that was taught to me, and has helped me and several others. I would like to review and share it with you.


First the problem:

 

We are sincere people who want to stand before Hashem and tell Him that we really do not want this lust in our lives. That "I want to do Your will, not mine."

 

We want to stand on these days of the Yomim Noraim, free of sin, free of this lust.

 

We want to come to Him and tell Him we want to be involved with Him more, and not be involved with the obsession at all.

 

But we are overcome with mixed feelings. Are we for real? How can I say that? A very big part of me WANTS the lust. CRAVES the lust. Yes, let's be honest!

 

Especially when we're at a "low". Don't we feel like we are still running after the sights, the fantasies? How do I surrender the lust to Hashem and tell Him - and myself! - that I don't want this, when really I DO?! We feel so guilty, so insincere. Like the words we are saying and davening can't really apply to us.

 

That's the problem.

 

Now here's the idea:

 

We have to understand that we have a disease. This disease is in OUR minds. It IS our minds. It's a voice, telling us that lust is something that we want. That lust is a solution to our problems, that it'll make us feel good. But that voice IS NOT ME!! It's the disease talking.

 

The voice could be really loud sometimes. And it makes me think that I WANT this. But really it's a theft, a deception. Because I am a good person who really doesn't want this. Look how much I've STRUGGLED with the obsession. Look how many calls I've made, and (possibly) how much time and money I've invested to cutting out this behavior. That's because I - the real I - really doesn't want this.

 

I compare the sickness to a cancer. Cancer uses the body's OWN cells to reproduce and harm the body. Also here, this disease uses the body's own mind and desires, and claims that we don't have a chance; that we need this lust!

Actually it is amazing how many of the excuses we have made are really the
disease talking. He convinces us that it's impossible to remain sober, especially for a long time, that it will harm our bodies, that it's really healthy for us, that it's something good, etc. etc. At least that's what it tells me. But it's all the disease talking. Not me. And definitely not reality. We know that.

 

For some people, the voice is really loud. Especially when we're in a bad
groove. When we're in fall, it's so hard to separate the strong feelings

and identify them as sick ones.

 

But every time we desist, with Hashem's help, the sick voices shrink back a little bit. Some of us can even go for a long time having the voice be really quiet, not bothering us much. 


But even the most veteran of us gets a pang every now and then. An urge, an out-of-control sinking and pulling thought that threatens us. And then we go into the same identity crisis: Is this me? Am I recovering or am I just fooling myself? Do I want this or don't I? Am I really doing well? If I am, how can I be getting this lust attack!!

And the answer is that it's the sickness, not us. No, we don't want this.

So yes, we can stand on Rosh Hashana - or any other time of the year - and
say to Hashem: I want to be close to you!!

 

Chances are, if we are unprepared, the disease will right then and there rally and clamor for attention. "Who do you think you are, trying to be close to Hashem?! Don't you see you really want me?! You LOVE me, you NEED me, you're hopelessly entangled with me."

But this is what we need to do. We tell those voices: "I KNOW WHO YOU ARE! I've seen you before. I know what you're trying to do! Quiet down please; I'm trying to live! You've made me so miserable!"

And when we're driving down the street and we're hit by something out of the blue, and the old "tenant" starts using our mind and whisper feelings of lust and obsession, we need to immediately identify that foe of ours. Let's catch him red-handed, before he gets a chance to steal too much. "I know who you are." And calmly, firmly, happily, we send him packing.

This is only possible with the program, of course. Because self - awareness
just isn't good enough. We still need to grow. To keep Hashem in our conscience minds and behavior.

 

But this approach allows the GUILT to go away.

 

We didn't ask for this disease. Fault is not the issue here - it's a sickness!!

 

I have heard in the name of R' Aharon Leib Shteinman Shlit"a that the place to daven for lust addiction is in "refa'enu", not 'Hashivaynu", or "slach lanu". This is very important to remember.

 

So what ARE we responsible for? Well, we know we have this disease. And we know Hashem hates immorality. Are we doing what we can to heal ourselves? Are we doing what we can to come closer to Him, to live our lives for Him and with Him? Perhaps this is our responsibility, the one for which we will be held accountable. Maybe these, then, are the questions Hashem will ask US after 120.

 

So let's keep growing closer and closer to Him. Let us surrender this disease and all our negative traits. And let us - the REAL us - connect with Hashem this year on Rosh Hashana, l'maancha - for Your sake.

 

It's a tremendous pity if we feel too guilty to even allow ourselves to get closer to Him, which is what we really want! Let us love Hashem. Let us feel loved by Him. It is true. All of us.


Retzoneinu Laasos Retzonecha.

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