"No Shoulda, Woulda, Coulda. . .", Food Ethics 101

May 2015
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farmers markey pic sept 2011
Licious-ness at the Farmer's Market

Hawaii Farmer's Bureau


5 - 7:30 pm
(Every Thursday)

5/7, 5/14, 5/21, 5/28 

(Long's Drug Store Parking Lot. We're the first booth)



(KCC) Farmer's Market
7:30 - 11 am
(Every Saturday)

5/2, 5/9, 5/16, 5/23, 5/30 

(We are next to Ma'o Organic.)



4 - 7 pm
(Every Wednesday) 

5/6, 5/13, 5/20, 5/27

(Located in front of the Concert Hall on King Street. Free Parking!



8 am - 12 noon
(Every Saturday)

5/2, 5/9, 5/16, 5/23, 5/30

At Ward Warehouse

Parking lot along Auahi Street.



9 am - 1 pm

(First Wednesdays)



"No Shoulda, Woulda, Coulda..."


   "Dying is a part of living," an Islands Hospice grief counselor told me.

   Shortly after my husband, Pete died at hospice, I packed my car and left almost in a panic. It must've been the last kiss I gave Pete on his cold lips that set me off. I felt suffocated each time I passed his body as I loaded the car up. It took quite a while to gather all the things I had just brought that morning. (If you are new to our newsletter, you can check the archive for last month's newsletter on www.GreensandVines.com which explains my husband, Pete's death).

   Pete hadn't eaten (the papayas I brought for him) for three days, so I left at 3am to pick up my juicer, (making some juice before packing it) and a bunch of veggies and fruits, coconut water for the visitors, food from Greens & Vines, utensils, cups, etc. Travis (our son) had also brought a little-larger-than-mini fridge too. I returned as soon as I could so if people came, I would be there to allow visitors in to see Pete.

   Slamming the back hatch of my SUV shut, I jumped in and left. I just wanted to go home to cry, forgetting the mortuary people would be coming to pick up Pete. But, as I opened the front door, it was with a lot of dread when the realization hit that I was going to cry alone. Not since Pete's operation 10 years ago to put a stent in his blocked artery had I cried alone.  "Well, I better get used to this..." was clouding my brain. "But how can I?"

   An hour or so later, Travis opened the door and climbed into bed with me.  He asked why I didn't tell anyone I was leaving.  I apologized and thanked him for coming over to cry with me.  He told me that it was lucky I wasn't there when the mortuary people came by to put Pete in a body bag and zip it up.  I agreed.  I was thankful he stayed for days to mourn with me.  His wife, Shanna was really sick coughing her lungs out, so she stayed away, but came back with Trav to clear out stuff in the kitchen and living room.  What a great thing for them to do for me.  They came back one more time to do a major sweep of stuff in the extra room along with their cousin Haili who came for the Celebration of Pete's Life, all the way from India.  But, I cried when I saw they took his worn pair of slippers away from the front door.

   The staff at Greens & Vines didn't skip a beat in keeping things running smoothly allowing me to mourn.  I am so fortunate that many of them have been with me since we were Licious Dishes at Dole Cannery, which started 8 years ago.  Taking Pete's place at the Farmers' Market took many, many people.  There is real appreciation for all of his contributions to making the markets a success.  Not only did he carry the heavy loads 3 times a week, he produced a gallery of laminated blown up articles he'd clip to the tent that "Not many others could brag about."

   Many of us hear him talking to us.  Gio said, when it rains, she hears him saying, "The white walls!  Don't forget the white walls," referring to the tent sides that need to be attached and rolled up on the sides to prepare for the harshest of rain and wind.  She sure misses her A-Team partner as he'd cut up the lasagnas for customers to eat right there, or prep samples, help handle the crowd up front to make sales and share his hospitality, inviting them to dine in the back on the extra table and chairs. 

   I hear his voice sometimes when tears roll down my face, even for the smallest of things.  The other day, I went to Walmart looking for Flour Sack Towels.  We use them to wipe the wine glasses.  A while back, I had asked Pete to show me where they're located since I'm the one shopping for things for the restaurant, but he said he'd get them, while I got something else.  Now that he's gone, I had to get them, but didn't know where they were and wasn't sure what the name of the item was.  Flower sack something?  I checked the gardening area, all the way over to household, but couldn't find it.  The employee there didn't know what I was talking about, so I left empty handed while tears welled up in my eyes.  When I got to my car, I could hear him saying, "No shoulda, woulda, coulda!  Just move forward," in his raspy voice from the hospital bed.  I must've facebooked that to my friends because my friend Barbara (wife of the late John Heckathorn --- I hate the word widow) facebooked me that she's been doing shoulda, woulda, coulda for the past 3 years and thanked me for sharing what Pete said.  And, she's right.  It helps me to stop crying too.  Since stress and depression suppress the immune system that guards against cancer, we need to be conscious of our shoulda, woulda, couldas, and just move forward.  When I got to the restaurant, I found a pack of new Flour Sack Towels I can show to the Walmart personnel next time.  Thank you, Pete.

Thank You For Celebrating Pete's Life With Us! 

Here's the program if you missed it.


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Earth Day is Every Day


We (Food Ethics 101 Meet-up Vegans) teamed up with the Vegetarian Society at the KCC and UH Manoa campuses.  I showed Cowspiracy at both, and donated a copy of the movie to the Sustainability Organization there and the Veg Society.  The response was pretty good as people were surprised to see the major role of livestock in Climate Change.  I bought a button from the Revolution Books booth that says Earth Day is Every Day.


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Vegan Potluck Meet-up


Showing:  Dr. Richard Oppenlander's

Food Choice and Sustainability


May 31st, Sunday 

(Last Sunday of every month)


This month, 12noon to 2pm at (organic)

Mohala Farms (Waialua, North Shore)


Bring a Vegan Dish and Join us!

To carpool, please meet us at 11am sharp 

at Greens & Vines




RSVP:  536-9680

(Especially if you want to help carpool or need a ride.)

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Sylvia Thompson
Licious Dishes