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Transitions - Parents and Mentors, Roots and Wings
Penny Wells, SADD President & CEO
This December, after 15 very fulfilling years at the helm, I will be leaving SADD. This is a good thing for both SADD and me - organizations need fresh ideas and people need fresh challenges. But it caused me to reflect on how my relationship to teenagers has changed over the years.
When I came to SADD in 2000, both of my children were teens and it was their struggles in school and their social lives that made the job at SADD so compelling. I learned over the years at SADD that parents are the most important influence for good choices in a teen's life and it is critical that parents stay involved on a daily basis in their teens' lives, even if their children push them away. Parents must be parents, not friends, and must set expectations (ideally, in an authoritative, not authoritarian way) and enforce consequences. Teens expect this role separation and even need those boundaries. I call this the roots and wings job - ("There are two gifts we should give our children - roots to grow and wings to fly") and striking the right balance for your child is the hardest but most important work you can do as a parent. More ...
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Does your state prioritize the safety of teen drivers?
Car crashes are the number one killer of teens today, and teen drivers are involved in fatal crashes at three times the rate of adult drivers. According to the CDC (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention), in 2010 seven teens ages 16-19 died every day from motor vehicle injuries. Despite these statistics, for many years teen traffic safety didn't receive attention or funding equal to the challenge, perhaps because there wasn't a "voice" for the issue on Capitol Hill.
SADD set about to change that, mobilizing teens to argue for more focus and resources from federal and state governments. In 2012, Congress passed a highway bill, Moving Ahead for Progress in the 21st Century (MAP-21), that for the first time ever, included "teen traffic safety" as a specific national priority for highway safety dollars provided to each state annually.
In 2014, SADD released 
the National Progress Report examining how states responded to MAP-21 with its new priority of teen traffic safety. The Report consists of a state-by-state analysis of fatalities involving teen drivers and examines state Highway Safety Plans (HSPs) that states must submit annually to the federal government to learn how states are addressing this critically important issue.
Click here to see what your state is doing in regard to teen driving safety initiatives.
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Parents Teaching Teens "Responsible Drinking"?
Recent study confirms it's a myth
Parents who provide their teens with alcohol and a place to consume it may  think they are teaching their children "responsible drinking." A new review of studies concludes this view is misguided. Researchers found parental provision of alcohol is associated with increased teen alcohol use.
In some cases, parental provision of alcohol is also linked with increased heavy episodic drinking and higher rates of alcohol-related problems, the researchers report in the Journal of Studies on Alcohol and Drugs.
"We suspect there is a surprising amount of 'social hosting' going on-parents providing alcohol for their teens and their friends," said study co-author Ken C. Winters, Ph.D., Professor in the Department of Psychiatry at the University of Minnesota Medical School. "Parents probably aren't aware that social hosting could have criminal implications in some states if things take a bad turn. I can appreciate that social hosting is often done with good intentions. Parents think they are preventing something worse by having their kids drink at home with their friends. But the risks are great." Read more ...
 SADD aligns itself with this and other research studies that reject the teaching of teen "responsible drinking." SADD promotes a "No Use" policy for underage youth and does not support or condone the use of alcohol by underage young people.
Learn more: If you are not familiar with SADD's mission and policies, please click here to learn more about our vision, mission, values and policy positions.
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Pass it On! Pass it On! Pass it On!
Share this issue with others using the Forward Email link at the bottom of the newsletter and
visit us often for resources, tips & other valuable parent info!
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Winter Focus
High school, stress and teens
By now your teen is well into the school year and likely juggling homework, sports, activities, clubs, a job, and friends. It's not uncommon that teens this age also experience some level of stress, compounded by the expanding range of responsibilities inherent with high school.
A recent CNN Living article looked into the dynamics of teen stress, with these highlights:
- Nearly 40% of parents say their kids are stressed from school, according to a new poll
- Growing up with social media means today's teens have less time to truly unplug
- Parents contribute to kids' stress by not knowing how to cope with their own, experts say
- Mindfulness activities such as "quiet time" are helping students lower their stress at school
The online article " SOS for Stressed out Teens" is a must-read for parents. It elaborates on the pressures today's teens face, provides tips for helping teens manage stress, and offers resources for parents to open the discussion about stress management.
Other resources
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Teens Speak up about Parents' Dangerous Driving Behaviors
But are parents listening?
According to recent research conducted by SADD and Liberty Mutual Insurance, new data finds that parents admit to engaging in the same dangerous driving behaviors they warn their children against.
Parents' Risky Driving Behaviors
According to the survey, parents actually admit to engaging in many of the same dangerous - and in some cases, illegal - driving behaviors that they warn their own children against, often at alarmingly high rates:
- Talking on cell phone while driving: 86%
- Speeding: 80%
- Texting and driving: 40%
- Driving after consuming alcohol: 34%
- Driving without a seat belt: 21%
Teens Speak Up, But Parents Don't Listen
Of the teens surveyed, 60% report they have asked their parents to put an end to dangerous driving habits. Similarly, the majority of parents admit that their teens are speaking up:
- 40% say their teen has asked them to stop driving without a seat belt
- 33% say their teen has asked them to stop texting and driving
- 26% say their teen has asked them to stop speeding; and
- 23% say their teen has asked them to stop posting social media updates while driving
SADD has long encouraged parents to talk with their teens about safe driving practices and provided evidence that young people adopt their parents driving behaviors - good and bad. It sends a conflicting message when parents routinely text while driving, but tell their teen not to. This rings true for other distracting driving behaviors as well. The best advice? Make sure you discuss and demonstrate safe driving behaviors for your teen.
Other driving resources:
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Editor's Note
Welcome to our first quarterly issue
Dear SADD Parents and Partners,
We hope you enjoyed the Winter 2014 issue. Our new quarterly format will have a seasonal focus to help parents negotiate common high-risk time periods and issues for teens in addition to the range of topics we traditionally cover.
As we prepare for the spring issue, we would love to hear from you with any suggestions or comments. Let us know at info@parentteenmatters.org what's on your mind.
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