While speaking skills are considered the primary component of communication, we cannot forget about its counterpart: hearing. Hearing is sometimes wrongly equated to listening. What is the difference between hearing and listening? We hear many sounds and may hear people speaking, but that does not necessarily mean that we actually listen to them.

An excellent communicator speaks and listens well. Listening requires attention; to be effective, we must practice active listening. Due to gender differences, listening may be approached with various styles. Females often provide non-verbal and verbal signals to indicate that they are listening. However, males do not typically use these signals to the same degree.

Here is an example: Does this dialogue sound familiar?

Female: "You're not listening to me!"

Male: "I heard everything you said."

Female: "How was I supposed to know you were listening? You didn't say anything!"

Active listening skills show the speaker that you are listening and you value their information.  You can show the speaker you are listening  with the  following:

• Maintain eye contact   
• Give non-verbal feedback, e.g., head nods, smile, saying "uh-huh"   
• Lean forward
• Restate or paraphrase
• Ask questions for clarification
• Listen for emotional meaning as well as literal meaning, e.g., tone of voice, facial expression, body language
• Refrain from interrupting or finishing  the speaker's sentences

Good listening skills is a key component for excellent communication; whether it be with your employees, colleagues, management, or even family members. We need to actually stop what we are doing and LISTEN. Speakers will appreciate it and we will learn more about what they are really saying.