March 2013
Welcome to s2s Insights!
Welcome to the Steps to Socialization newsletter
s2s Insights. Each month 'Social Thoughts' contains a theme article on a relevant social topic. Informative articles or books related to the theme can be found in 'News and Reviews'. The 'Tips and Tools' section contains social thinking tips and activities. 'In the Neighborhood' covers related events and programs.
Social situations are a challenge for our students. In this multi- part newsletter we discuss how to help them prepare for various social settings.
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Social Thoughts
We often assume that our children know exactly what to do in a social situation because it comes easily
and intuitively to most of us.This is simply not the case. Let's look at they what you need to know in varying social settings:
- How do I socialize in different groups?
- How do I join in a group?
- How do I greet others?
- Where should I go when I am meeting someone for a party?
- When is it my turn to order?
- How do I get a waiters attention?
- When do I take my money out to pay?
- Where does the line start?
There is so much to know and understand. How can we help our children?
The first thing we need to understand is that even
though they may have previously encountered the same situation, they still may not know what to do. Watch what they do when left on their own. It is in their best interest to give them the opportunity to figure things out for themselves. If we constantly handle the money, order their food, tell them which line to stand on and allow them to follow instead of leading, they may never learn to figure out 'simple' social situations.
The key here is to guide them but to do so one step at a time. Very often we want our children to do everything at once. But just as we don't expect a baby to go from turning over, to being able to run, it takes time and guidance to achieve the end result. The social situations we encounter are complex.
Teaching them the power of observation should be one of the first steps. Help them learn to watch what others are doing in each situation and then have them imitate what they have observed. Encourage them to try even if they make mistakes. Explain to them how and when you have made errors. Allowing them to make mistakes teaches them that we all make mistakes and that it's okay.
The benefits for them will be great. Not only will they start to pick up the ability to predict and plan ahead, they will also learn that social situations are not as anxiety provoking because they have learned to handle it on their own.
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Tips and Tools
Concept of the Month: The Power of Observation
The eyes are our most powerful tool in social situations. Observing people and learning to read the nonverbal cues helps us to know what to do and to react to various social situations.
Activity: Do you see what I see?
When you are out with your child talk about what you are observing. Don't assume they are seeing the same things in the same way that you do. They may not be aware of what is happening right in front of them. Ask them what they think the people around you are thinking about, what they are feeling, what is going to happen next. 'Notice' what people do when the walk into a store. How do they decide when and where to get on line. How does someone know when to order? 'Notice' the people walking down the street. Where do you think they are going? Why do you think that?
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See you next month! In the meantime, please visit us on the web and read our blog.
Evelyn
and Lisa |
