This article is primarily for parents of underclassmen and even middle-schoolers.

Fairly consistently in Guidance & Counseling, we hear requests to do things unconventionally. Conversations begin with "What if I take such-and-such a class at another school or online...?" "Should I take a year off of high school and...?" "Am I on track to get into...?" "My family and I are going to the Bahamas for two weeks in October...?"

The list of questions is understandable. There is no poor question when students are trying to plot out a pathway to their aspirations. However, beginning with the end in mind and then working backward can alleviate much academic stress hence page 65 of the Course Description Book 2013-2014 (2012/13 edition linked). 

A parent might approach a counseling appointment with, "My child wants to earn acceptance to Princeton and we're wondering how to go about getting that goal." While the question isn't flawed, the person answering it in a guidance office will surely give you a vague, general and probably unsatisfying answer. We may even point to The College Board's College Handbook.

Everyone remembers the tourist who asks the jaded New Yorker, "How do I get to Carnegie Hall?" And the Hennie Youngman answer is always "Practice!" Or worse, something from Mad Magazine's Snappy Answers series in the 70's.

In answer to the original Princeton question, you'll want to ask them, is the stock answer. The Princeton undergraduate admissions team is versed in their admissions requirements. Also, their previous year's first-year student profile will yield great data. On the flipside, Guidance Counselors are versed in what it will take to graduate from high school. While this oversimplification stymies parents, imagine the misinformation you will receive when I tell you an exact GPA and SAT test score and just how wrong I will be when the skinny envelope comes to your door.

By the way -- spoiler alert -- you will also receive a vague answer from the Princeton admissions rep who will be mildly put off by having to explain that they reject 9 out of 10 applicants.

So, you are going to get a Zen-like answer when you ask the Princeton (Yale, Rice, etc.) question. That admissions rep's answer will be vague and it may go like this: take the toughest classes your high school offers, study hard, be a leader, do well on tests and do some heavy-duty collaborative things over time that change the world.

With regard to College Tips, the title of this week's article is "How Much Do You Want It?" I draw your attention to the world of privateer guidance counselors who, for a price, provide more in-depth coaching and organizational skills so that your child may systematically approach submitting complete applications that wow admissions and scholarship counselors.

This service is your choice, but be aware that all of your children frequently get exactly what they've earned. Occasionally, someone nationally will get something they haven't earned. Anyone who's ever been cut-off in traffic knows that.

Of course, telling your child's story most effectively is paramount and that is where the for-profit counselor comes in. The race sometimes doesn't go to the swiftest but the best prepared and that's a great lesson. For the applicable sports cliché of the day: hard work beats talent when talent doesn't work hard. From the Boy Scouts of America: Be Prepared. And finally, from the folk of Bob Dylan's A Hard Rain's A-Gonna Fall: "But I'll know my song well before I start singin'".

The answer to the college question how much do you want it is found solely in the fruits of your child's labors and how you frame them. Early on, you have to want it very much, you can't vary too much, you can't waiver too much and you can't flop too much. While your child's creative energies and approaches to problems are valued in admissions offices, they see so many great applications from thousands of students nation- and world-wide that you have to hit all your marks all the time from early on.

How much do you want it? Show us.