Teen Challenge is expanding in Africa. This month we have several reports on Teen Challenge's progress in bringing hope to the addicted in Africa.  

Jerry Nance is sharing the need for leaders to be "Jesus with Skin On".  

May God bless you and your ministry.    

The assurance of Jesus being with us is one key relationship we all appreciate and need. However, there are other relationships that we also need as we pass through this life.

I love what one little girl said to her mother after she had fallen and scratched her leg really bad. She came into the house crying and her mom said to her, " Jesus will help you through this and He will touch you." The little girl thought about what her mom had said and then said to her mom, " Mom, I need Jesus with skin on." Sometimes we need Jesus with skin on. We need the warmth of a loving human being to help us.      

This is why it is so important that we build and develop key relationships in our lives.

Building great relationships takes time and energy. And you only discover how valuable such relationships are when they're tested.

One author writes:

"Contouring your heart to beat with another requires extensive whittling, to trim away self-centeredness. It's like riding the bus; if you're going to have company you must be willing to scoot over to accommodate other people and the baggage they bring. Your actions in doing this express the importance of the other person. One relationship becomes more valuable than others because of its ability to survive and endure realignments."

To have friends you have to be friendly! It takes effort on your part and mine to develop relationships. Many of us allow our schedules to dominate our time and our attention. We often don't take the time needed to develop relationships.

Through the years Libby and I have moved multiple times due to our work in Teen Challenge and so often lost all the effort we had made in order to develop friends outside of our relationships within Teen Challenge. We have developed friends and then had to move to another region of the country. Even within Teen Challenge it is so easy to get so busy that you don't make time for building relationships.

Some leaders in the past have said things like, "Don't get to close to those who work with you or, don't share too much of your personal challenges or they won't respect you." I can tell you that I do not agree with this position; however, there are certain challenges you have in life and family that everyone doesn't need to know about.

That is why it is so critical that we build relationships with a few key people with whom you can share your deepest concerns and deepest burdens. Your relationships are critical as you pass through life and the challenges that life brings to you and to your family. We need one another to stand with us and to bear one another's burdens. We need those who will keep a confidence and not judge us when we are struggling.

Jesus is the friend who sticks with us and we can count on him! His grace and mercy are amazing and along with His guidance we can enjoy deep relationships with others who walk in our shoes with us. That's called empathy. When you have a friend who will walk in your shoes with you and feel your pain, that's a friend. We don't need others' sympathy, we need their empathy.

I have come to realize that the qualities I value most in a friend are two-fold:

(1) The assurance that they won't bail out when the road gets rocky.

(2) The knowledge that our imperfections and scars won't change their level of commitment.

Solomon said, "A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend that sticks closer than a brother" (Proverbs 18:24).

It's about quality, not quantity.

That's why heart connections can be so much stronger than blood connections. I can truly say that I am closer to my Teen Challenge family than to most of my own natural family. I have come to love and appreciate our TC family and I love our culture of care and support. I have a few key relationships which are very important to me.

Let me suggest that you not be too quick to discount someone's good qualities because they made a mistake, disappointed you or did something without thinking. People are human and they make mistakes. True friends sometimes pass through tough times together and at times let one another down. Some struggle with such deep issues they don't feel they can trust anyone at that level. That is where we each need to be careful to not find ourselves. We must trust our relationships and not allow the enemy to get a foothold in our lives that can't be shared with someone we hold as a friend.

Love means risk, but the payoffs outweigh the investment. Behind every success story you'll find people who once felt so discouraged they wanted to quit, who fell and needed lifting when someone stepped in, picked them up and helped them to keep going.

We need each other, we need true relationships. Build them and you will experience a deeper joy in life knowing you have those you can count on, "Jesus with Skin On!

Jerry Nance