November 2012 IssueVol 4, Issue  6


I Did Not Know 

What To Say  


 Dear (Contact First Name),

WELCOME EVERYONE!  We would like to express our deep gratitude to you for being a part of the I Did Not Know What to Say Community. We hope that our newsletter and website have provided you with useful information throughout the year.


I would like to wish everyone a very Happy Thanksgiving. May your Thanksgiving be filled with many blessings!


Featured Article: Thanksgiving Memories: Love, Loss and Good Eats by Gloria Arenson is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, is a wonderful reminder of the simple ways to remember a loved one during the holidays. Our sense of smell and taste can evoke such vivid memories and making a favorite dish of someone that has passed away can warm your heart. Our family enjoys many of my mom's favorite recipes during the holidays and each time I make one of her favorite dishes, I feel like my mom is right there with me surrounding me with her love.


Holiday Grief Support Resources - We invite you to visit our website to explore the many resources we have put together on how to assist a loved one that is grieving during the holidays. If you have a resource you would like us to include, please email us at


Holiday Sympathy Gifts - Visit our website for a wide variety of sympathy gift ideas for the holidays. Several of our vendors are offering Holiday Discounts on selected items.

Be sure to also join us on Facebook and Twitter for resources and on-going discussions on ways to assist a loved one that is grieving.


Do you have an inspirational story you would like to share? We invite you to submit your inspirational stories, letters that have reached your heart, a favorite quote or poem, an unforgettable outing, or a book that touched your life. We would love to hear from you. 



With Love and Gratitude,  









Happy Thanksgiving!






 Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow.



~Melody Beattie

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Featured Article

featureThanksgiving Memories: Love, Loss and Good Eats

 by Gloria Arenson 


Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday. It was my Mom's too. My mother was a wonderful cook. Her turkey stuffing was simple but memorable. In fact, my brother used to tease that he was going to make a stuffing sandwich with the leftovers the next day. I think he really did since it tasted even better on day two.


My Mom died the day before Thanksgiving in 1979. Every year since that time Thanksgiving has been bitter sweet for me. It is still my favorite holiday because of the family togetherness and wonderful feast, however it also reminds me of my Mom's death too. One  of the wonderful things that commemorate my mother's life is that making her special stuffing has become a family tradition. No matter how fancy the food, her simple recipe is reproduced and eaten with gusto. Over the years my son has taken on the job of creating this dish and does it with love as he remembers his grandmother too.


Of course my mother has been gone a very long time, and I no longer grieve, but it is comforting for me to think of her as we are gathered together. Her spirit is always in my heart and I recall how she bustled around making sure that everyone was stuffed and happy. Whenever I feel sad I try to practice the advice of a wonderful teacher and author, Ken Keyes, who said, "To be upset over what you don't have is to waste what you do have." Ken was the personification of that thought. He was a quadriplegic who could only   move one finger. Yet he radiated love and light and inspired thousands of people.


When I feel carried away by my negative feelings such as loneliness, grief or hurt I talk to myself out loud and make a list of what is in my life right now that cheers me up. I usually start with the basics, with being grateful that I have a bed to sleep in, a roof over my head and money in my wallet. I keep listing until I realize that I also have people who love me and appreciate me and I still have loving memories of the ones who are no longer with me.


Perhaps, like me, you have lost someone who was also a great cook. You might honor her by making her special dish and sharing it with friends and relatives. With each bite you can remember and thank that loved one. If you are still grieving make your own list of what you can be thankful for at this time of year and see if your mood shifts to see the brighter side of life.



Article Source:


About Gloria Arenson
Gloria Arenson is a Licensed Marriage ad Family Therapist. She is the author of award winning Five Simple Steps to Emotional Healing, How to Stop Playing the Weighting Game, Born to Spend, Desserts Is Stressed Spelled Backwards and EFT For Procrastination. For more information go to

Thoughtful Sympathy Gift Ideas

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Delicately etched, our memorial glass ornament will brighten spirits as you remember loved ones. Free personalization included.



Visit our Thoughtful Sympathy Gifts page for a wide variety of sympathy gift ideas for your loved ones. We hope the thoughtful gifts listed on our website inspire you to give warmth and joy to your friends and family in their time of need.


Holiday Specials Now Available!

About I Did Not Know What To & Lori Pederson
LoriLori Pederson created I Did Not Know What To Say in April 2009 as a platform to inspire and provide resources to people that wanted to help their friends and family through the grieving process. 
Lori's expertise comes from those experiences that only life can provide.  Over the past twenty years, Lori has lost many family members, including her mother to ovarian cancer, as well as many friends, colleagues and pets.  She is no stranger to loss and the grieving process.
Throughout her life she has been blessed with many friends and relatives that were there for her as she experienced these great losses. She understands that although people want to help, they often don't know where to start.  I Did Not Know What To was created out of Lori's desire to assist people find the words when they don't know what to say or do.
You can learn more about Lori and her organization by visiting, reading her personal Blog or contacting her at:
Lori Pederson

Each week we will be adding new inspirational stories and resources to our website and Blog.  Help us reach our goal of providing inspiration and insight to the world by sharing your story or resource with our online community.  We would love to hear from you! 
Share Your Story. Please email us your inspirational stories, letters/cards that have reached your heart, a favorite quote, an unforgettable adventure, a thoughtful gift idea, a book that touched your life, or a suggestion for our website or newsletter to 

If you are an author or expert in the field of grief recovery, we would love to interview you for our Blog and/or one of our upcoming newsletters.

If you have a website, Blog or newsletter, we ask that you consider including our information on your site.  Here is the link:   

I Did Not Know What To Say is a website created to inspire and provide you with tools to assist a love one through the grieving process.

With Love & Gratitude,


Founder, I Did Not Know What To Say

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