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How do we go about finding love and how do we go about keeping it once we've found it? I know, I know: Much has been written on this very subject, and who am I to add to that muchness? I'm someone who has had a great deal of experience in both areas.
Here are a few of my observations.
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In the finding realm, remember these three key things:
1. Keep an open mind. What you see as dealbreakers might just be strong preferences. Don't say "I'd never date a redheaded woman" or "The man I'm looking for must own the latest-model expensive car." What do those things have to do, really, with the inside of a person, with their heart?
2. Keep a cool head. If you find yourself dazzled the instant you meet someone, remember that what you're seeing might be a Potemkin village. Give yourself time to find out what's really behind the facade.
3. Keep on trying. Don't be discouraged if something that seemed promising isn't working out. Above all, don't stick with someone out of desperation, only because you're afraid that's the best you can do.
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The art of love is largely the art of persistence.
~ Albert Ellis
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In the keeping realm, remember these three key things:
1. Keep on trying. That's right: Not giving up is just as important here. Love is hard work... and it's worth it!
2. Keep your shirt on. Patience is one of the most useful virtues you can foster in all of living, but most especially here.
3. Keep the love light shining. If you start each day reveling in the fact that you have found the one you want to be with, it will show in your actions... and in your face.
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Love at first sight is easy to understand;
it's when two people have been looking at each other for a lifetime
that it becomes a miracle.
~ Amy Bloom
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But this is just one woman's opinion. We'd love to hear from you, whether you're looking or you've already found what you were looking for. We invite you to send us your ideas or your story.
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