Raise your hand if you would love to prevent conflicts! Okay, that's a lot of hands. Here's a tool to help you do just that! In our workshops, we teach when and how to send I-Messages-the concept of the Confrontive I-Message was created by Dr. Thomas Gordon.) Linda Adams added a few more and they are mighty helpful. Read on!

The Preventive I-Message is a way of preventing problems and conflicts in a relationship.

The Preventive I-Message lets others know what you need and want.

The theory behind the Preventive I-Message is that other people are better able to help you meet your needs if they have a clear picture of what you want.

A Preventive I-Message, like all I-Messages, is direct, clear and congruent.

There are three major steps in sending a preventive assertion...