Q: A central theme of your book seems to be the process of coming to accept your life as it is, not as you wish it could be. As a professional, what would you recommend to parents to help them with that process?

A: First, I try to help people look at their grief. It doesn't help to pretend to be positive when underneath you may be lonely, afraid, or sad. I learned we don't have to lie to ourselves. You can grieve. You can complain. You can mourn. This helps you to go on, make the best of the situation, and enjoy life. Our life force is resilient, but the desire for the healthy child or a typical family life may endure, and it may be hard to let go of that longing.

Second, I try to help people accept themselves... read more of the conversation