I am often asked by fellow NACD moms, "How do you do it?" "How do you get it all done?" "Why do you have your kids involved in so many activities?" The easy answer is to say that I am a little crazy. (But I'm really not.) I think it comes down to our different, unique personalities, and how that impacts our approach to life and schedules. I have always been passionate about human behavior, even to the point of getting a degree in psychology. Recently as I have been thinking and reading more and more about different personalities and personality traits, I had an "aha" moment. I have always known that I am more of an extrovert. I am loud and get excited easily. I have a lot of energy (just not past 9 pm, when I turn into a pumpkin). My intensity level is generally always at a "10." But you don't have to be an extrovert to "get it all done." Introverts have their own unique gifts and can often be even more productive. Where I am going with all this is that if we as moms and dads can identify how our personalities work, and then from there develop a plan for what we need in order to be more productive with our kids, ultimately we can be more effective parents. In this article I hope to provide you with some input on how to do just that.

Carl Jung, who popularized the terms "extroverts" and "introverts," believed that we each have some characteristics of both, just that one is generally more dominant. Extroverts, in general, have an intense need for stimulation. (I can enjoy a weekend in Las Vegas.) Extroverts tend to be more outgoing, like a high level of activity, are perhaps more aggressive, and generally are able to make quick decisions. Introverts, on the other hand, function better with less external stimulation, tend to be more contemplative, perhaps reserved, and may have more of a careful balancing of considerations before reaching decisions. Susan Cain, author of Quiet, researched introversion as a personality trait and discovered that while some see it as a weakness, it is actually a strength. In a NY Times interview in 2012, she said, "There are many different definitions that psychologists use [in defining introversion]. One that many would agree with - and that I like - is 'people who prefer quieter, more minimally stimulating environments.' The key is about stimulation: Extroverts feel at their best with and crave a high degree of stimulation. For introverts the optimal zone is much lower."

So here is my life as an extrovert: I have three kids. I have worked for NACD for over 16 years, starting before I was a mother. When kids came along I was neither able nor willing to completely give up my career. My husband and I rely on my income, and I love working for such an amazing organization. Fortunately, I work for a company who believes that mothers and fathers should play an active role in their child's development. Over the past 11.5 years, Bob has let me change roles, stop traveling, or increase my traveling, take my babies with me to different locations while I was still nursing them, etc. In turn, my babies have been videotaped many times, (three of my babies are who you see in the program videos), they have been guinea pigs, and they have each been on program since they were born. They still do program. I am able leave at 3:00 every day in order to be at home with my kids. (For those of you who work and are also trying to fit things in, I encourage you to talk to your boss. Is it possible to come in later in order to work with your child and then stay later, or vice versa? Is it possible to telecommute or do some work from home? More often, employers are letting moms and dads have a bit more flexibility, which in turn creates happier employees. Happy employees can also be more productive employees.)

UPCOMING EVALUATIONS

  

January 2015

February 2015