May 12th 2013 is Mother's day. How do you feel about a Mother's day? It really depends on who you ask. As for myself, I do not even remember what day is Mother's day, since I lost my mother a long time ago. Not a mother myself and not associates with anyone who lives with their mother, so mother's day could be one of the normal Sundays for me, but probably a Sunday that I will avoid going out for a Sunday brunch.
But what if this is the first Mother's day without a mother? Or, the many Mother's days that keep reminding you the loss of your own mother? Or, you are living far away from your mother and you are not able to see her as often as you wish to? Here are some tips on how to handle the motherless day on Mother's day.
1. Honoring your mother by making her best recipe and throw a party for friends and family. Only if your mother is a good cook. Otherwise, think of something else that she does well and share it with others.
2. Silently or openly share thanks about what your mother had done and forgiveness if needed.
3. If you are going through the acute grief process, intense sadness may occur, but you do not have to be alone. Reach out and surround yourself with those who love, understand and support you.
4. Write a letter to your mother to tell her what you wish to share with her, good or bad, exciting or boring life that you have, and burn it when you are done with it. Or send it to her, only if you are willing to deal with the consequence.
5. Don't forget that your father is the one who picked your mother for you; he also needs your loving support too in Mother's day. You can ask him to share stories about your mother by taking him out for lunch or dinner and honor their time together as a couple.
6. If there is too much anger toward a mother, it is okay to feel that way too. Write down what makes good mother to you and honor that inner child of yours that you have done a great job even though you did not had a good mother while growing up. Forgiveness, forgiveness and forgiveness is a kindness to oneself and others.
7. Take other people's mother out for lunch, especially those who do not have a kid or their kids are not around, or they are not as cool as you :)
8. It is okay to mourn for the role as a mother too. Visit other children who have no mother or donate a gift to children foundation on the behalf of your loss child's name.
9. Remember, no matter you are mourning for the loss of a mother, or a role as a mother, or a potentiality to be a mother, you are a beautiful woman who has so much love to offer and yes, you should be proud to be a woman on a Mother's day.
