Overcoming Overwhelm

It's ironic, isn't it, that the very month I decided to write about Overwhelm was a month that this unpleasant phenomenon took its suffocating stranglehold on me. How very dare it?

And it is even more bizarre that the causes of this overwhelm were mostly GOOD THINGS. Holidays are good things. Visitors are good things. So are the next lot of visitors. And the next! Work is good. Projects on the house are good. Going out to evening events is good. The children being on holiday is good. Writing Roots and Wings is also good. But there are occasions when all this good stuff piles up and threatens to knock you over flat.

Anyone else had that?

After a sleepless night with my brain racing at 100miles an hour, trying to resolve a heap of problems which could easily wait, I came to a realisation.

I NEED SPACE.

In the event, I didn't need a lot of space. Just a walk outside on my own. A sit with a herbal tea watching as a beam of sunlight opened up the treasure chest of autumn across the valley. A chance to clear my head of all its imaginary stuff. And to put the washing on.

Later, on checking my emails, I noticed three in my in-box about managing Overwhelm (hey, that's not fair, I thought of it first!!).

What do you do when you feel overwhelmed?

Here are five top tips for the next time you get the first signs of that overwhelm feeling, whether it's the tightness in the tummy, the stranglehold, or the feeling that you just can't get your head around everything.

1. Press the Pause button. Often our overwhelm is around the amount we feel we have to do, so we race around cramming it all in. Press pause, take a break. The busier you are, the more you need to take breaks! Remember, what is a break for one person might not be for another - so my woodland walk might be your dance class or someone else's breadmaking session or another person's singing. Reconnect with yourself and disconnect from the busy-ness. What kind of pauses work for you?

2. Step Back to gain Perspective. In one of your breaks, take some time to look at the bigger picture. Think about where you were this time last year, or where you might be this time next year. Look at some old photos. Reflect on how far you've come. Ask yourself, what is important to me now? Step back from the activities and decide what is really required right now. Map it out for yourself.  What helps you to step back and gain perspective?

3. Break it down. When something feels too much, make it smaller. Break your day into hours. Break the big projects into sections. Tackle things in small chunks - use a timer if you need to keep it manageable.

4. Share it out. You might need to say "This is too much for me right now". You might need to ask for help with some of the activities that are feeling too much. You might need to just get the feeling out in the open - and it is surprising how often speaking it out loud can help.

5. If you can't get out for exercise or in the fresh air, simply Breathe. In . . . . and then Out . . . Deeply, slowly, evenly  - count in and then count out. Wave your arms in the air, roll your shoulders a few times then keep them back, keep your head up. SMILE! Often when we are overwhelmed we literally forget to breathe properly.

If you spot in your diary a period which looks busy (good busy, bad busy, it can sometimes mean the same), PLAN AHEAD. Where can you take your pauses? Who can you ask to help? What can you say No Thank You to? How can you build in your sustaining activities to times where your routines are disrupted in some way?

With HOLIDAYS coming up, why not think now about how you'd like to manage the silly season and avoid being overwhelmed.

I'm planning SPACES in my diary, and aiming to get outside. That's what I know I need.

 

Transitions Series

Giggle Parenting

Kate Orson, a local Parenting by Connection Coach,  and I came up with the idea of doing some work together after a fun session I ran for the Kindermusik Mums in the Spring. We had a really great laugh and Kate told me she'd learnt how to run Laughter Yoga sessions. That immediately caught my interest and we started to explore how we could bring our two very different personalities and skills sets together in a way that can help parents find the fun - especially when it comes to peak pressure points (like the festive season that is coming up, but I still believe it is a little early to start talking about!!).

We're running a workshop together in Basel in early December for parents who want to reconnect with their fun side - and also get some serious benefits from letting more laughter in. It's a sad fact that our children laugh 20 times more than we do. That CAN'T be right ! Join us and let's redress the balance.

Laughter is good for you. Science says so!

If you want to keep in touch with what we're planning, please check out our Facebook page - Kate shares her background here too.

If you're interested, you might want to keep the evening of Monday 9th December free - to be confirmed!!!

 Despite all the new things coming up, my two core pieces of work remain the same. They are a little like my own personality - the need for plenty of quiet, private time, and the need to balance this out with lively group time (or is it the other way around, I don't know!?).

1-1 Coaching is a very private space where we can work together in total confidence.

Group Workshops give you the opportunity to connect with others over a common interest or challenge.

So what do you want to see from Alive to Change in 2014? Yes, it's time to start planning for the coming year! Are there any themes or topics you'd like me to cover? Are there any workshops you'd like to see or attend? What do you struggle with as a Mum Abroad?

I'd love to hear from you.


Thank you in advance for any input,

Kirstin
kirstin@alivetochange.com

PS Please do share this newsletter with anyone who you feel would either enjoy reading it, or could benefit from coaching. Most of my work is based on word of mouth - and THANK YOU for using YOUR words to help your friends!