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We're on a roll. Feb was money. Mar was death. In Apr, perhaps because of tax season, I've moved on to pain. May will be flowers and sunshine!
Four principles about pain (physical, emotional, spiritual):
1) Everyone is in pain
We often want to take an attractive portion of another's life as though it is indicative of the whole. "See how polite her children were. Wish ours could be like that."
Trust me, she's in pain. Perhaps not in the way her children interact with other adults. Perhaps not in the way her children smile for family pictures, but scratch below the surface and everyone is in pain.
2) My pain is real to me even if your pain is quantifiably greater
My hangnail really hurts even if you are struggling with chronic Plantar Fasciitis. The maturing me recognizes varying degrees of pain and is empathetic to those around me, but no level of maturity changes the fact that pain is painful.
3) We can learn from pain
Pain can teach us. Sometimes we learn to lift with our legs because our back hurts after lifting improperly.
That is one of the challenges faced by today's generation of parents. We are told to allow our children to experience natural consequences while virtually everything about the way the world is structured encourages us to shield our children from pain wherever possible. Failing the test may be a form of natural consequences, but it could contribute to my having to pay more for my child's education when she fails to get the scholarship.
4) Avoid (detrimental) pain where possible
I've been told, "No pain, no gain." I'm not sure that's entirely true, but conceding that point I encourage you to avoid detrimental pain - pain that damages me and those around me.
As wonderful a teacher as failure may be, success can be an even better teacher. Recovering from alcoholism may teach your spouse about the need for a supportive community and a disciplined approach to living. Avoiding alcoholism is likely better for everyone.
What has life taught you about pain? | 
