Money - it's one of life's big topics and one about which we continue influencing our children.  Along with faith, family, love, interpersonal communication, education, employment, and marriage, discussions of money always involve values.

Here are three values we are attempting to teach and one strategy for doing so.

Do your children think about money?  Are they aware of its impact in so many areas of life?  When they think of buying a car do they include insurance, maintenance, and gas in the overall cost?  When they talk about life dreams and aspirations, do they consider how money will play a part in achieving those objectives?  Do they realize that the value of what one does each day to earn money does not correlate directly to the amount of money one earns?

Do your children know when something is a good deal?  Do they care if something is a good deal?  Do they save money for the future?  Do they understand that something unneeded that will go unused is never a good bargain, even if it's free?  Do they know where the clearance racks are and understand that out of season doesn't necessarily mean it should not be considered?  Do they understand the benefits of a used car over a new car, and the relative merits of buying versus leasing a car?

Do your children share well with others - without being prompted?  Are they excited to see their money as a resource with which others can be blessed?  Do they recognize the relational and societal dangers of hoarding?  Do they recognize that a handout is not always the best way to help someone?  Do they see a need to give of their time and talents and not just their money?

When our oldest child entered high school, we realized that we had a problem.  Money slipped through his fingers like, well, water held in one's hand.  We were worried that when he went to college he would be first in line for the credit cards at the student union and that he would call us one day about the $20,000 bill he had amassed.  So, we instituted Big Allowance.

We figured out what it cost per year to keep him in our home and then gave him 1/12 of that amount per month to manage.  We didn't include groceries or utilities, but did consider school fees, activities, haircuts, private music lessons, clothes, dining out with friends, etc.

At the end of the first year we realized that we had simply turned the tap on full and put his hands under the water.  There was simply more money disappearing.  I also found out that I was married to the federal government.  "Where did you get those new shoes?  They're nice, but I thought you didn't have any money left."  "Mom felt sorry for me and bought them."  Bailouts were not the solution.

The second year my wife instituted the envelope system and apportioned each month's big allowance into designated envelopes.  Some were red envelopes - the money had to be spent for the designated purpose (think school fees), and some were green envelopes - he could spend as he wished (if he wanted to skip haircuts and eat out more often, that was his choice to make).  This was a much better system for this child.

Child #3 just asked when he could begin Big Allowance and so Jan 2016 marked the start of the process with him.  Each child has been different and there have been successes and failures along the way.  We are convinced that it has made our children more aware of their money and more careful with its use.  It has not changed their personalities or their overall orientation to money.

In the end, if our children are aware of money, committed to some level of frugality, and generous with others, we will feel good about our influence in this area.  They will not be us or share our complete outlook, but they can be responsible stewards of the resources to which they have access.

Of course, this is taking place while we are attempting to influence them in all of the other areas listed above.  No wonder parenting is so challenging and rewarding.  Only love could call you to invest in someone else so fully.