I joke that all children in our community are gifted, but if you listen to those around you that's how it often sounds. Parents compete by proxy - they are no longer the athletes, the prom queens, the drum majors, the lead actors, the gifted academics, and so they compete through their children.

It starts early.  I remember my wife being concerned when our children fell behind the developmental markers exhibited by other children within their play group.  While I tried not to minimize her concern (since she was the one who chose to stay home with them each day), I did point out that I was confident our children would not enter high school crawling, sucking their thumbs, or wearing diapers.

Children may believe they are more special than they are and act from entitlement, arrogance, or misplaced confidence that sets them up for failure when the competition heats up at the next level.  Your child who scores three goals in five-year old rec league soccer is unlikely to become the next Landon Donovan but he may think that's his destiny when he listens to you brag about him to your neighbor.

Parents may ignore or deny evidence that undermines their carefully crafted version of reality.  These are the parents who argue with the schools about what their children have been caught doing rather than partnering with the schools to find a solution.  These are the parents who write the unreadable Christmas letters filled with accolades and accomplishments, but no hint of reality or the challenges of living in close proximity with other maturing humans.

Worst of all, parents may be embarrassed by their children when they don't live up to the parental propaganda, but rather than focus on continuing to parent their children, they are more concerned with recovering from their embarrassment.  These are the parents who laugh nervously and turn back to the other adults around them, either trying to deflect attention from their child or explaining why what everyone is seeing is somehow different than what it obviously is.The next time your child embarrasses you in front of someone, refocus your attention on continuing to influence your child and release the need to cover up your embarrassment.  You're not the first parent who faced this and you won't be the last.  But you may be the first among your peer group who chooses to leave the competition and to concentrate on the needs of your maturing child.