Common Outlook Consulting Inc. New Perspectives
May 2014 - Issue # 14-05

Founder's Message

As children, we are said to be special. From - and through - that promise of youth, and fueled by intense exposure to media, many of us form the idea that a special life awaits us. As we grow, so grows a sense of entitlement: if we are special, then surely there's a should-have/special life waiting.

When we become adults and (in most cases) are claimed by the ordinariness of the everyday, it can come as a shock to realize we are not that special and are not living that special life. Before long, and in comparison to what we think we could or should have become, we begin to see our ordinary-good (and even lovely) lives, as failures - or at least as "disappointing".

The should-be or unlived life begins to haunt and overshadow the good life. Slowly, it becomes the truer, the meant-to-be, the right life...causing us to cultivate regrets about what should-have-been, and to distance ourselves and disconnect from our everyday lives. A sense of guilt (or perhaps more accurately, resignation) may set in-endless possibilities were in front of us and somehow, we blew it. We blame ourselves...and others.

The conflict between the unlived, should-be life and the ordinary-good life is perhaps, the most profound and far-
reaching conflict we create for ourselves and for those around us. So, with an idea to resolving that conflict, let's take a look at the statements you considered in the April issue, and the perspectives behind them.

Allow us to offer this additional tidbit: if you can resolve this conflict through a change of perspective, could you perhaps apply that to almost any conflict?




You are unique and special and no one but no one is ordinary, which, when you think about it, makes everyone ordinary.

~ Harlan Coben, Hold Tight




Turn the idea of infinite possibilities into grateful acceptance.


Coming Up  


Watch for our June issue, when we explore the delicate topics of Honesty and Disclosure.



If we are to find the 'good' life, we must first see the ways in which the 'should-be' life shadows our everyday lives, and then decide if those perspectives truly serve us. And with that purpose in mind, we are examining the five statements we asked you to look at
last month

Read more


Peter Hiddema

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