The news events of the last few weeks have been devastating in many parts of the world...the bombings in Boston, another large earthquake in China, financial crises in Europe, explosions in Texas, and droughts and flooding in many other locations on every continent.

In myself and with my own clients, I've encountered fear and grief, confusion and disorientation, and helplessness and despair because we cannot control or explain what is destroying so many lives.

I'm perhaps closest to the events in Boston because I have family and friends there. Thankfully, all those whom I know are safe. None of them are untouched, however, by the fear, turmoil, and grief.

My niece, who teaches at a Boston university has several students who were significantly injured and one who died. Many more are suffering from the effects of stress such as nightmares, crying jags, difficulty concentrating, and general anxiety and worry about what will happen next.

Psychologists say that these are normal reactions to disaster, and even those directly unaffected by physical injury are likely to struggle with emotional aftershocks for many weeks as they struggle to feel secure again. Individuals who have experienced trauma before, including returning veterans or those who have weathered other natural disasters, are likely to experience more lingering effects.

Specialists have written about the fact that more resilient survivors tend to share their emotions before they are overwhelmed, know effective ways to cope with stress, and have the ability and desire to focus on finding a "silver lining" or sense of purpose and meaning.  

Yet guidance for ways to access resilience and positive focus when reminders of destruction and loss are relentlessly present, and hurled at us frequently in daily media blasts, is not easy to come by.

One inspiring prescription is to choose a focus on gratefulness. Easy? Hardly. But as Brother David Steindl-Rast, renowned expert on the subject writes, "Grief and joy are more like twin sisters than the sworn enemies we often take them to be...Grief comes from a heartrending appreciation of what matters most to us; while joy reawakens us to life's wonder even when we've discovered how precarious it is."

Brother David reminds us that the word "precarious" comes from the same Latin root as the word "prayer." Prayer in this context does not necessarily mean formal encounters with a distant deity, but rather that we reconnect with the basic Source from which we come." We can feel this connection in so many ways in any given moment even when we are convulsed with sorrow...the timely touch of a friend or loved one, the sight of a hummingbird hovering, an innocent toddler's laughter, or kindness in a stranger's eyes.

These glimpses of essence restore us and teach us to let go again and again of what we struggle unsuccessfully to understand and to bear. As Steindl-Rast points out, "None of us would have the heart for this task if we did not begin to see that the light has a steady presence in spite of outward appearances. Ultimately, with joy we realize that the radiance we glimpse flows steadily and illumines all creation in an everlasting glow."

Mindfulness teaches us that a full life turns neither from grief nor from joy. A full life becomes like that of Zora Neale Hurston, who wrote, "I have been in Sorrow's kitchen and licked out all the pots. Then I have stood on the peaky mountain wrapped in rainbows, with a harp and a sword in my hands." To lick out all the pots of sorrow and still rejoice in rainbows, Brother David asks, "Could we hope for a more profound expression of gratefulness?"

Rick Hanson, author of Buddha's Brain and Director of the Wellspring Institute for Neuroscience and Contemplative Wisdom, points out that for our hunter-gatherer ancestors, the biological response to feeling threatened served to keep them alive in extreme environments. Today, we are less well-served by trauma responses; in fact our hard-wired threat response can also be the cause of many emotional, psychological and physical problems. Instead, gratitude and the appreciation of even the smallest experiences of good in life, is a powerful antidote to being threatened. His learning program for finding and appreciating the good, even under harsh circumstances, can be found in his new book, Just One Thing, and on his website. Over time, Dr. Hanson believes it is possible to change the brain gradually to retain experiences linked to appreciation and well-being.

For a brief practice to help transform grief to gratefulness and ultimately to joy, visit here. Visit also here for a short article Gratefulness: A Source of Strength and here for more Gratefulness links and resources. 

I hope that this article can help sustain you during whatever stressful times you encounter. Please feel free to pass it along to clients or loved ones who might need extra encouragement

You in my online community are an important aspect of the greater good. I appreciate your presence, support, and participation. For individuals who are experiencing persistent distress, you might want to refer them to our integrated pain program or to our newsletter archive (scroll down to find it) for other free and helpful articles.

My best wishes for a smooth transition into late spring and early summer and all the good you can find during this time,

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