As we gear up for the Week of Constructive Conflict, I was reminded of my personal encounter with the Westboro Baptist Church (WBC) in New Orleans several years ago. Attending a Jewish conference, I confronted a dozen protesters.  Their placards said "God Hates Fags" and "God Hates Jews" and "Your Rabbi is a Whore" and "God Hates Your Feelings."

 

Conflict is all around us. It is unavoidable. The key is in how we deal with it. The capacity to dissent as the rabbis prescribed contributes to critical thinking, to creativity, and to innovation. It's why Apple says "think different." It is essential to education and it is a crucial element to our success as individuals and as a people.

Westboro Baptist Church exhibits none of the qualities the Mishnah mandates.  From my brief encounter, I was sure that constructive discussion was impossible.

I was wrong. 

Two individuals (a Jew and a non-Jew) engaged one of the most virulent of WBC hate-mongers in dispute for the sake of heaven. They did not hold back their revulsion at WBC hatred, but treated her with humanity and respect. As a result of these interactions, the spokesperson for the Church, a granddaughter of founder Fred Phelps, left the WBC and renounced its theology of hatred. You can read the whole remarkable story here.

Not every conflict can be resolved in this way. But if the tools offered by the rabbis can work with members of the Westboro Baptist Church, surely we can use them to address conflict within our own community.

A few hundred of us will be studying these tools at the Feast of Jewish Learning on February 20th - learning how to apply this rabbinic wisdom for ourselves. I hope you can join us.