Alice, Jane's daughter, called me to inquire whether Jane, had an estate plan in place and where her paperwork might be. I told Alice I could not disclose that information as Jane, and not Alice, is my client. I advised her to talk to her mother to discuss her plan.

Jane then called to tell me that Alice was concerned that she did not know what Jane owned or where her important papers were. Jane is somewhat "old school" and asked how much she should disclose to her daughter.

The simple answer is that she should tell her daughter what she is comfortable telling her. If she determines not to disclose her assets or important papers, then at the very least Jane should have her papers well organized and located where Alice could find them in the future.

The major advantage of full disclosure is that unpleasant surprises are avoided in the future. For example, if Jane told Alice that she was named as her health care agent and attorney in fact under a durable power of attorney, Alice would know that there was a plan in place and that she was part of it. The conversation should go even further: Jane should tell Alice what her health care wishes are. The Massachusetts Health Care Proxy is an empowering document: It gives the agent the authority to make any and all health care decisions. If Jane never told Alice what those wishes were, Alice would always wonder if she made the right decision. Alice should also determine whether Jane funded her trust; if not, then assets not in the trust might be subject to probate.

If Jane confided in Alice the status of her assets, Alice could determine whether the proper plan was in place for the disposition of those assets. For example, Alice might notice that Jane's bank accounts or investment accounts were solely in Jane's name and if so, suggest that Jane name a beneficiary by making the bank account a "pay on death" account or the investment account a "transfer on death" account. These types of designations avoid probate and will save Jane's estate unnecessary cost and expense.

Jane should review all of her beneficiary designations with Alice. Where Jane has not named a beneficiary the account will be subject to probate.

LESSON: Many people are uncomfortable disclosing financial or legal information to their children. At the very least, the children or other loved ones should be made aware that a plan is in place and that they may be part of it. If you have any questions in this regard, be sure to contact your estate planning or elder law attorney.

Mary Immaculate Health/Care Services enjoys the reputation in the Merrimack Valley as a faith-based provider of healthcare and housing for older adults. Our expansive facilities offer a full continuum of care including independent living, adult day health, short term rehabilitation and long term care.

Marguerite's House Assisted Living at Mary Immaculate is one of the best kept secrets in the region. For an average cost of $2,000/month, residents can maintain their independence in spacious one bedroom apartments. Services include assistance with personal care, medication management, meals, housekeeping, laundry, transportation and 24 hour on-site emergency response. Mary Immaculate Health Care Services is located at 172 Lawrence Street, Lawrence, Massachusetts.

To learn more, visit www.mihcs.com