I'm playing my viola, rehearsing the fourth Brandenburg Concerto with a chamber group in our sanctuary, and I'm trying to focus only on the notes, my fingers on the fingerboard, and my hand on the bow. I'm trying to listen and make my notes fit perfectly in with the notes of the other instruments. And as I play, listening for the right tone, counting the rests, thoughts continue to arise in my mind.
During a measure's rest, the thought will intrude. Will the kids have told my husband that their spelling homework is due tomorrow? We might have to make time to do it in the morning. Or maybe I shouldn't worry about that, it's their responsibility to manage their homework, if they forget they'll just have to explain to their teacher...
And then it's ten measures later and my hands have kept playing but my mind has wandered away from my presence in the ensemble and my place in the music. I'm no longer playing as well as I could be, because those thoughts intruded on my focus. So, a deep breath, and back to the music, back to letting those notes and sounds fill my consciousness. If I'm at my best, my consciousness will eventually sit off to one side and I will focus on the music seemingly with no thought intruding at all.
Music is like meditation in this way. A goal of meditation is to clear the mind. You may have been invited into a meditation practice where you focused on your breath, following the path of your breath through your nose and into your lungs until your chest filled, and then following it back out again. I have learned a kind of meditation where we count our breaths: one in, two out, three in, four out-until we notice a thought arising to intrude on our meditation. Then we notice the thought, let it go, and start again with our breathing: one in, two out.
After becoming experienced at meditation, the practitioner may find moments-maybe even many strung together!-when thoughts do not arise and there is no other sensation except the breath. But as a step along the way, a meditator may simply become practiced at noticing thoughts and letting them go, not letting them interfere with the meditation itself. Our thoughts are just our thoughts; meditation helps us not hold onto them or worry about them or let them distract us from our spiritual path.
Zen Buddhism teaches a concept called "Beginner's Mind," which is an attitude of openness, eagerness and lack of preconceptions when approaching a topic-even a topic which one knows well. Beginner's Mind helps me play my music. If I begin to rely on my own years of experience playing the viola, or worried about my ability compared to other musicians-in other words, if I get caught up in what I know and how much expertise I have-I can't calm my mind and focus on the music. If I approach rehearsal as a beginner, and think to myself, I must pay attention, I must focus only on this music and this moment, then I have at least a chance of becoming the conduit through which the composition flows. When my playing is at its best, my mind is clear and the music itself is like a meditation.
This Sunday is Music Sunday here at First Unitarian Church. We will honor All Saints' Day with music of celebration and mourning. We will celebrate 30 years of musical leadership with our Director of Music Will Sherwood throughout the day: during our morning service, during a potluck luncheon after the service, and during a concert with our choir and the Worcester Polytechnic Institute Brass Ensemble at 3:00 p.m. I hope you'll join us with your ears and hearts open, eager to hear this music and to let its phrases pull you into a spiritual space and practice. Music is one path to that ocean of enlightenment we seek.
In faith,
