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As a physician, I've seen many patients who felt trapped in obsessive relationships. They can't stop thinking of someone. They can't stop checking their phones to see if he/she texted. A great part of their consciousness is devoted to ruminating about what this person is doing or not doing and they are afraid of losing the person. These obsessive/possessive relationships can be very painful.   

I discuss this topic at length in my new book The Ecstasy of Surrender: 12 Surprising Ways Letting Go Can Empower Your Life. In the book I emphasize that bonding with a partner is a natural part of getting to know someone and of falling in love. But getting overly attached and possessive goes beyond healthy bonding and is disempowering. When you truly love someone you're not interested in possessing the person or keeping him or her in your clutches because you're afraid of losing the relationship. Instead, you respect your partner's autonomy and spirit. You're not too entangled, by standing together side by side. True intimacy is always a balance between bonding and letting go so the relationship can breathe.    

ARE YOU IN AN OBSESSIVE RELATIONSHIP? TAKE THIS QUIZ 

• Do you cling to your partner?
• Do you want to possess him or her?
• Are you often afraid of being abandoned or betrayed?
• Do you get anxious when you don't hear from him or her every day?
• Do you constantly think about the person?
• Do you start obsessing about a partner after you have sex?
• Does your partner feel you are trying to control or suffocate him or her?
• Do you feel you can't live without the person?