Just to prove I'm not gender biased :-)

A Spanish Teacher was explaining to her class that in Spanish, unlike English, nouns are designated as either masculine or feminine.
 
'House' for instance, is feminine: 'la casa.' 

'Pencil,' however, is masculine: 'el lapiz.'

A student asked, 'What gender is 'computer'?'

Instead of giving the answer, the teacher split the class into two groups, male and female, and asked them to decide for themselves whether computer' should be a masculine or a feminine noun. Each group was asked to give four reasons for its recommendation.
 
The men's group decided that 'computer' should definitely be of the feminine gender ('la computadora'), because:

1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic;

2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else;

3. Even the smallest mistakes are stored in long term memory for possible later retrieval; and

4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.

The women's group, however, concluded that computers should be Masculine ('el computador'), because:
 
1. In order to do anything with them, you have to turn them on;

2. They have a lot of data but still can't think for themselves;

3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they ARE the problem; and
 
4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had waited a little longer, you could have gotten a better model.

Let's Twist Again. . .

Ah, the holidays! So much fruitcake, so little time! If your digestion and (how to put this delicately?) elimination are not quite up to snuff, try this simple twist. Twists massage the internal organs and are great for "getting things going". They're also very relaxing, so, why not?

Lie down with your feet flat on the floor, about 2 feet apart (the width of a typical yoga mat) heels close to the body, knees bent up, arms resting comfortably at your sides. Take a slow, deep inhale, and as you exhale allow your knees to drop to the right and gaze over your left shoulder. Shoulders should relax comfortably on the floor. If your neck is uncomfortable you can gaze in the direction of your knees. If your knees don't reach the floor or you notice any discomfort in the low back place a pillow underneath your knees. Take four or five deep easy breaths, then exhaling, slowly draw your knees back to center and gently allow them to drop to the other side. Take another four or five breaths on this side before drawing your knees back to center. You may like to extend your legs and rest there for a few breaths before pressing your way back up to seated and slowly rising to standing. I recommend several of these throughout the day and before bed. Along with plenty of water, gentle exercise and fruits and veggies to offset the seasonal feasts, well, suffice it to say - things should be moving along better! ;)

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Well that's it for now. Remember: Patience and Persistence. In the music library business as well as in life!