Rather than checking names off a list, maxing out your credit cards, and rushing from one event or store to another, give yourself the opportunity to do something different this year while there is still time. Plan ahead!

        Start now with the planning but first acknowledge any emotions you have about the holidays. Maybe you've lost a loved one in the past year. Maybe you're financially pinched. Maybe you've already agreed to host the relatives you find most annoying. Take a few minutes to have that good cry, shiver out the fear, or pound out any anger.

       Then you can get over the pitfalls and install the reality in your head  - this is a wonderful occasion to commit to generating oodles of joy, love, and peace. One of my favorite truths to keep repeating is "I love you." This offsets all my petty thinking. It's so versatile. I can be walking down the street and apply it to all that I pass. I can think it while I'm writing my holiday cards. I can use it anytime.

        Another good reminder is that it's the season to give selflessly. This means you can increase the amount of love you feel by giving without expectations, without the need for reciprocation, and without needing the gesture to be appreciated. Selfless giving is opposite the anger core attitude of self-centeredness, where we believe that the world revolves around us and we feel separate and isolated from others. Giving without a selfish motive generates love because genuine giving is one of the four core attitudes associated with the emotion of love. It just makes us feel good.

Good gift giving takes some forethought. Get out your planner and designate when you'll partake in every aspect of the holidays so you don't work yourself into a last minute frenzy. Here are some tips about ways you can make your holiday giving truly memorable:

1. When writing your cards, reflect on something you appreciate about the person and express that.

2. Make a list of who you want to give a gift to. Then one at a time put yourself in their shoes and decide what would be meaningful for him or her.

3. Ask yourself "How can I impact others in a positive way?" Maybe find a cause to volunteer to help, such as visiting a hospital, serving dinner at a shelter, or collecting toys for those less fortunate. Volunteering is an easy way to put your concerns about your life on the back burner and get perspective about the larger picture and the joy of the season.

4. Consider giving something homemade like they did in the "old days." Bake something, write a poem, make a video, put together some photos, give gift certificates for future outings or chores you'll do, or get crafty and make something.

5. Give gratitudes, appreciations, or kind words about how you feel about your friendship or the person's actions, attitudes, or personality.

6. The idea is to stay present so you bask in the spirit of the season. Focus on the activity of the moment, open your heart, and enjoy the love.

"Why, this is fit for me."