You can do something about people in your personal environment who exhibit negative behaviors, such as blaming, criticizing and name-calling. Here are successful strategies when you're the object of someone frustration and anger.
1. Don't take the bait and respond. Don't try to defend yourself and strike back with similar tactics. Let their comments roll off your back. Pretend they are speaking a foreign language or reframe their cruel words by reminding yourself that they are feeling the emotion of anger. You are merely the convenient target. The reality is you are fine. They have an awful style of communicating.
2. Excuse yourself and in a safe place identify the comment, criticism, or blame that really bothers you. Deal with your own anger, fear, and/or sadness physically and constructively when you think about the comment. That means express the emotional energy as a pure sensation.
For anger that means pound, stomp, yell nonsense words. While pounding hard, fast and with abandon, make sounds, oooowww, and keep to the facts, stating, "I just feel so angry. Angry. Angry." While moving out the emotional energy, it's imperative not bad-mouth or focus on the blamer.
Take a tennis racket to your mattress or punch a pillow. Go for it until you are exhausted. Catch your breath and do it again, thinking about the comment but refrain from name calling or swearing.
For fear, shiver and shake, getting in touch with how scary it is being around a loose cannon. Keep shivering until you touch the fear and your body trembles on its own.
For sadness, allow yourself to cry, because it hurts to be so misunderstood, negatively viewed, and repeatedly not being seen for your true self.
3. Figure out what's true for you about the comment. What do you want to say about yourself? How does it feel to be targeted? For instance you might want to say, "I'm afraid you're going to be critical no matter what I say. I feel like I can't win. I can't get it right. I feel like I'm being unfairly attacked for minor things. I don't want to be attacked, because it makes me feel like shutting down. I don't like being constantly corrected. Your cruel words can ruin my whole day. I want to feel more love and more connected with you."
4. At a neutral time, speak out your truth. More than likely you will have to lovingly repeat your truth many times to counter their deflections and knee-jerk reactions. Stay strong and deal with specific incidents. Make it clear that it is up to them to change their behavior. Don't get distracted and clearly repeat your truth until you feel it is heard. If necessary set a boundary - say what you will do in the future if the blamer continues his barrage, such as leave the room, hang up the phone, break down and cry, etc.
End your communication with an appreciation of the blamer, thanking them for listening and acknowledging something you like in them.
If you follow and practice these guidelines, you will feel good about yourself for finally breaking the cycle, and calmly standing your ground to say what you've finally been bold enough to say and do.