It seems reasonable on occasion to look at our actions and assess whether they are of benefit. Does striking back improve the quality of life lived here in human form? In Dr. Phil's words, "How's that workin' for you?"

In practical terms, the spiritual practices of nonresistance and forgiveness have nothing to do with anyone or anything outside of us. Not the third-grade teacher who humiliated you or the lover who betrayed you. Not the economy, your boss, the diagnosis received, or the addiction which haunts you. They have nothing to do with any other person or any outside circumstance in your life. All of those things are very real in your human experience, and it is not helpful to pretend they are not. But they aren't the causes of your misery. Your suffering results from your thoughts and beliefs ABOUT those circumstances.

When we resist or refuse to forgive , we add a second layer of pain on top of the first. You have not only received the hurt, you are choosing - moment by moment, day by day, year after year - to actively suffer from the hurt you have received. Nonresistance is refusing the hurt. Forgiveness is releasing yourself from the bondage of victimhood.

Once again... your suffering has nothing to do with the other person or the outer circumstance. YOUR suffering is the result of YOUR thoughts ABOUT the situation. YOU are the chooser of your thoughts. This is your faculty of Power, aka Dominion. In the symbolism of the Bible, humankind was given dominion over the things of the earth. We have the power to name things good or bad, and to choose how they play out in our consciousness.

Right now, what is the most difficult situation or relationship in your life? Do you enjoy the daily battle? Does the constant fight bring you peace and contentment? Is your day-to-day life experience enhanced by it?

Now, pause. Imagine that you are literally pressing a "Pause" button on that experience. It's still there, it hasn't gone away, but in this moment, you have chosen to pause. In this moment of rest, consider the Truth that you are a necessary and loved expression of the Source of All Good. Consider that in Truth, nothing opposes you. Consider that you are always among friends. Consider that someone, somewhere, has had the same experience you are having, and has been able to love, bless, and claim Good in their life regardless of that situation. Consider that what one has done, each can do.

Consider that the peace of the Christ is always within you. Breathe... Rest for another moment in the Truth that you are never isolated, but always cared for by the Oneness, the Wholeness of the universe. Breathe again... Feel the warmth of the Love which is always present within you radiate from the center of your Being throughout your entire body, and on to the friends and fellow travelers along the human journey. Breathe again, slowly. And again... Know that you are among friends.

When it feels right to do so, make your choice. You may release the "pause" button and resume the battle, or you may simply refuse the hurt. It is your choice to make. The good news is that you can make that choice in any moment, at any time, in any circumstance. You may choose to accept the hurt or refuse it. It is always up to you.