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Greetings!
"For each new morning with its light,
For rest and shelter of the night,
For health and food,
for love and friends,
For everything
Thy goodness sends."
Thanksgiving by Ralph Waldo Emerson
A friend sent this perfect prayer to me. Perfect because of the sentiment and perfect because Dorothea Dix, subject of my historical novel coming out in April, lived not far from Ralph Waldo Emerson and I think she would have agreed with what he wrote being the compassionate crusader that she was. I do. And it's perfect for the season with Emerson titling it Thanksgiving.
In my caregiver support group I've been attending since Jerry's stroke and heart attack a year ago, we're encouraged to keep a kind of Thanksgiving or gratitude journal. I don't but I do spend a few minutes each morning being grateful for at least five things noted from the day before: new windshield wipers put on before the big storm; no power outages in our neighborhood; identifying the latest infection for Jerry and his getting shots for it; finding the acupuncturist's office without difficulty; sleeping nine hours as Jerry was able to sleep through the night so the dogs and I did too. Small, seemingly insignificant things, details that speak to the quality of life. People often say that the devil is in the details but I'm of the opinion that God gets there first.
Jerry sneezed on October 12, such a small, involuntary thing. Then his back went into spasms followed by his digestive system going on strike perhaps in response to the medications reducing the spasms. His bladder refused to cross the picket line and suddenly we were in the swirl of MRIs, CT scans, X-rays, bone scans, ultrasounds and emergency room visits (why do the complications peak on the weekends!) trying to find the causes and appropriate treatments. Three hospitalizations, one back brace, a kyphoplasty (procedure to inflate and place a gel inside a broken vertebrae), massive amounts of antibiotics meant to get his digestive system working and catheters, walkers, and nearly six weeks later, Jerry is home from the hospital and now fighting a bladder infection but we're hopeful. A good night's sleep does wonders.
In the interim we've had prayers and healing thoughts sent our way by the dozens. Once I let go of the guilt of canceling events I found I wasn't such a nurse Ratched after all and maybe I could channel Florence Nightingale (except for the shot parts; I still can't do those). Friends from church and beyond have brought us food; neighbors watched dogs while I spent hours in the hospital; Jerry's daughter arrived from Florida for 10 days and she not only likes to cook but plans meals ahead! Imagine that! Jerry always said he was the cook in our family as a matter of self-preservation. Our friend Sandy has come twice to stay, walk the dogs, encourage healing so we can travel together once again next year. My caregiver support group kept right on supporting even when I couldn't attend. Just knowing they were there was a help.
Each day I found the gratitude exercise to be both comforting and rich with hope: The hose didn't freeze when I forgot to take it off the outside bib; I remembered to get dog food before we ran out; the people at DMV were patient and helpful about a lost title I was trying to retrieve; we lived close to a superb hospital, exceptional physicians and extraordinary nurses and therapists; Jerry ate a good dinner (he's lost 15 pounds); we didn't have to go through any of this during a hurricane.
So in this season of Thanksgiving Jerry and I find ourselves grateful for too many things to recount. We've sent prayers and funds to those recovering from hurricane Sandy and we pray that you will recognize the treasures in your lives this season and extend your own mental health by being generous to those in need. And as Emerson noted, be grateful for "everything Thy goodness sends." | 
The Revised Fundamentals of Caregiving, A Novel by Jonathan Evison. (Algonquin of Chapel Hills Press, 2012).